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"Afraid of getting old, I have the solution! " Topic

8 Posts

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401 hits since 4 Mar 2017
©1994-2018 Bill Armintrout
Comments or corrections?

Gunfreak Supporting Member of TMP04 Mar 2017 4:49 a.m. PST

Forget the tonics and surgery. This is physics based. And not that silly quantum woo either.

We all know time is affected by gravity. In fact low earth orbital satellites. Have to compensate for the fact time goes faster up there than down here. Now if the moderate gravity of earth is enough to slow time enough that your instruments can detect it.

Imagine how much slower times goes in the center of Jupiter.

So for the low low price of 500 trillion I'll send you to the center of Jupiter. This is guaranteed by Einstein himself to slow your ageing.

But if this entry level deal isn't good enough for you. I'll send you into orbit around a black hole. We're you'll only age seconds while we in earth age decades or even centuries.

Now this is a special offer only good for the next 20 minutes or until stock runs out. The price is $9,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999.48 USD

Only a few left in stock.

ScottWashburn Sponsoring Member of TMP04 Mar 2017 5:04 a.m. PST

Except from your perspective it won't seem like any longer. That's the whole point of Special Relativity.

Skeets Supporting Member of TMP04 Mar 2017 6:35 a.m. PST

Let me get my checkbook!

Personal logo etotheipi Sponsoring Member of TMP04 Mar 2017 9:58 a.m. PST

Will you take a bank draft from a Nigerian Prince? You just have to forward the cashing fee and it's all yours.

Ed Mohrmann Supporting Member of TMP04 Mar 2017 11:50 a.m. PST

You left out the bit about Jupiter's gravitational

JSchutt04 Mar 2017 3:21 p.m. PST

Yeah…. being reduced to the size of a pea in the process does not appeal to me…I'll pass.

jah1956 Inactive Member05 Mar 2017 12:53 p.m. PST

What rubbish I or my Nigerian partner can sell you LFP Live Forever Pills (As used by the Grand Masters of the New World Order ) For the low price 1,000 dollars US a pill.You just need to take 25 pills a day. The small side effect that bits of your body fall off is a bonus, It actually saves you money you will never have to buy shoes socks gloves or willy warmmers again. All you need to do is send 650.000 dollars US to for this month supply to Bill the boss's pay pal account. Hurry up and do it now.

jah1956 Inactive Member05 Mar 2017 2:48 p.m. PST

Sorry Tango 1 I forgot to ask you if it was okay to use your pay pal account I do not have one as pay pal keep closing mine, you can keep 20% as commission OK

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