"OoTS - Speculation on the Thing in the Box" Topic

Today's Order of the Stick comic got me wondering again…

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I'm a big fan of the comic strip, and I've read it all the way through (Erfworld is pretty good, too, I think), but one thing I've always wondered about is "what the heck is that creature in the box?"

Rich Burlew has been keeping it a mysterious secret for a long time, and I wonder if the eventual reveal will live up to the hype I've got built up in my mind.

Anyone (D&D players especially) care to speculate on what the Thing is?

-Alex in Alaska

Schrodinger's Mountain Lion?

heh… that's a pretty good guess.

I expect it will always remain undefined.
-Kle.

he that shall not be named, and should not be named.

I don't think we will ever know.
Its smart enough to talk…
It was captured by "big game hunters" in the wild…
Goblins aren't completely terrified of it…

I'd guess it was some type of awakened dire animal, but I'm pretty sure its going to be something much more powerful than that. I think it could probably give Xykon a run for his money…if it weren't so dim-witted.

I believe that it was captured shortly after the filming of Monty Python and the Holy Grail and that it is the legendary black beast of AAAAAAAAAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

Wait, that doesn't look right – it should be more:

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGHHHHHHHHHHHHH at the back of the throat.

ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH!!!

*ahem*

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRGH!!

…

Something like that…?

An awakened dire animal sounds like a possibility, maybe, but as Lukash said, those probably aren't powerful enough, and I also have the impression that the creature could give Xykon a run for his money.

I was thinking maybe a half-demon or animal deity's demigod?

But definitely not too smart. Heh…

I'm not sure even RB knows what it is.

One of the few times he uses his powers are in strips 475 and 477 (when Haley and Belkar are trying to rescue Roy's body from the Creture). Esp. 477

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Hmmm… and at one point he stomps the ground and makes a giant tremor, too, I think…

To be honest, I expected a bit more speculation and debate. :)

Future possible Belkar quote,"What are you, some sort of over-powered, home-brew, uber-demon with more spell-like abilities that you could ever use?"

A few observations:

Whatever it is, it isn't actually evil. So it's not CE or LE, but probably some strain of neutral, and very likely Lawful Neutral (it's big on rules and following them).

Whatever it is, it isn't full grown. It's a child "thing." Notice that it's attitudes and behaviours aren't actually stupid, but child-like. It wants to play, likes story-book outcomes, and enjoys toys (which is what it treats "Mr. Stiffly" as).

So extrapolate from that:

What is Lawful Neutral, immensely strong, of average intelligence, capable of producing earthquakes, and, as a child, is just slightly larger than man-sized?

Note also that in episode 477, the Thing-in-the-Darkness also admits to being "tired" after the earthquake action. So there is some sort of limit on how often it can do such things.

Hmm… could it be a Li Lung (Earth Dragon) from the Fiend Folio?
Neutral, 7-9 hit dice, can cause an earthquake once per day which is equal in length and width (in 10' increments) to three times the age of the dragon.

I don't know if this critter is really tough enough to be the implied threat that it is to our heroes. (What level are they anyway?)

And I'll admit to being stuck in 1st ed. AD&D mode, so I have no clue as to how dragons (much less Li Lungs) have been modified in recent editions. The FF description really doesn't sound like a beast that could knock a paladin through a stone wall, as happens to Miko.