"Movies that should be forbidden by the Geneva Convention" Topic

Quite simple. What movies would you consider inhumane to force someone to watch?
It does not matter if a few actually like them. Nobody will judge you. I leave the choices totally up to you. But try to keep it confined to "popular" movies, and stay away from movies whose sole purpose was to disgust people. I will call out on those.

1. Play it as it Lays. From 1972. I saw it in theaters. I had no warning. I totally forget what it was about. All I remember was a barely suppressed need to kill myself. I know this is a very obscure choice.

2. Showgirls. What could possibly be wrong about 2 solid hours of beautiful naked women? Oh, the plot. The dialog. The plot. The acting. The plot.

3. Zardoz. Even Sir Sean hated it. But it got him out of James Bond.

4. Most Elvis movies.

Elvis movies? It has been a long time but I knew a lot of the songs.

I remember walking out of Guilty as Sin (1993) in a base theater before it got even worse. You have to imagine the night life of Sierra Vista/Fort Huachuca AZ to think how bad that makes the movie.

The English Patient. He took too long to die, even tho I wandered the lobby of the theatre for 15 minutes to kill time.

Walked out of The Money Pit

No one should have to see Mama Mia. 1 or 2.

The last two Star Wars "sequels." I'd rather rewatch The Phantom Menace. Multiple times. (And no one should be subjected to it, either.)

The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen. One of only two movies I've ever walked out on.

Hot Tub Time Machine. Dragged to that one by my wife and her friend. A total waste of time.

Gods and Generals. There's so much fail in this movie it's almost impossible to list them all.

K-pax. Worst movie ever. Absolute drivel that tries very hard to be profound and nothing happens.

Fortunately the wine and a day's skiing numbed the effects somewhat.

Another is Eraserhead which may fall under the category of sole purpose to disgust people. Walked out of the theatre even though I was an impoverished student at the time and we didn't have a TV. Actually Eraserhead may be worse than Kpax.

Any of the various High School Musical movies.

2001

Almost anything put out by Disney in the last 20 years or so, with a few exceptions.

All of the Billy Jack movies.

Gods and Generals

Wait, 2001? Surly not "2001: A Space Odyssey" the Sci-FI classic. Love that movie. It was nominated for a bunch of awards and took home some Oscars. It is ranked #22 of the AFI all time 100 movies ever made.

link

Any movie that stars Adam Sandler.

My top three in order are:

1. The Thin Red Line
2. The Thin Red Line
3. The Thin Red Line

Gods and Generals also sucked but nowhere as bad as those top three.

Anything with Barbra Streisand is also unwatchable. Thankfully she has withdrawn from public display the last few decades.

I was in Saudi doing R&R in S.E.Asia when Betamax and VHS were fighting it out so I'd say all of Roger Cormans Philippines movies from the 1970's… No, wait… ALL the Pilipino action movies from the 70's and 80's. Wait a minute… add all the 70's and 80's Hong Kong movies with the words Shaolin, Dragon or Master in the title. That'll do it.

But then there's Scorpion Thunderbolt. And I paid to see that. Will the horror never end… My brain hurts!

Stop that! Nobody is allowed to dispute anyone else's choices!
Oh wait. I didn't say that in my OP.
Never mind.
But yeah. It is kind of ….. slow.

The Great Land of Small. Supposed to be a fantasy movie. We paid to go see it with our son, and it turned out we had already seen all the scenes that were even slightly interesting in the in the trailers to a couple movies we'd seen the previous month.

I've never seen it resuscitated on television.

Grelber

Human Centipede (no, don't watch it if you haven't seen it.) Really disgusting & disturbing, and to spoil the ending, the bad guy gets away. It's the only movie I've seen (and I've seen most of the ones listed above) that I felt should never have been made…

Terms of Endearment. My wife loves this movie. I despise it. Yet once a decade or so I am required to demonstrate my loyalty by watching it. Funny, she'd never watch Zulu with me. What's the deal?

Bakshi's "The Hobbit", the first "Dune".

"The Wild Wild West" with Will Smith
"Cats" with Taylor Swift
"Da 5 Bloods" by Spike Lee

Eraserhead
The Patriot
U-571
Fury

We're counting Star Wars products after the first three films as movies? Then of course them too. I had mercifully forgotten the first Dune. But yes, of course, if my captors threatened me with any of the above, I'd break.

Can we get a special mention for "The Way We Were?"

I tell people who haven't seen Star Wars…

1. Watch ep IV
2. Watch ep V
3. Watch ep VI, until you hear Obi-Wan say, "a certain.
point of view…"
4. Then get up and walk out.
5. Imagine how you think the rest goes. You'll do a
better job.

The Thin Red Line is indeed awful, tho the final assault on the hill was an excellent sequence.

I saw an interview program where Christopher Plummer was lamenting his experience working with Terrance Malick on The New World. Colin Farrell was on the same shoot and told Plummer not to fret. He said their parts would be cut out in favor of some sequences featuring birds.

I was once stuck on a 6 hour bus ride in the early 2000s, and the only movie the bus had was Stomp the Yard 2. Hard to ignore when you had one of those TV screens busses used to have right above the seat in front of you.

On the matter of the Star Wars sequels and prequels, Marcia Lucas (editor of the original Star Wars and The Empire Strikes Back and The Return of the Jedi): link

Yikes. And I agree with every word.

Message From Space…a very horrible Japanese rip off of Star Wars. Went to a midnight show. I think the entire theatre walked out en-mass.

Every single super hero movie made after Dark Knight.

Any movies with Yoko Ono, John Lennon, Barbara Streisand, or Keanu Reeves.

Parzival, for all that, my tickets to "Phantom Menace" for myself and my son were money well spent. When we left the theater, I said that I saw no reason why reshooting the chariot race from Ben Hur in Monument Valley so you could sell a video game should be considered movie-making. The kid argued me all the way across the parking lot from the theater to the Best Buy--where they were already selling the pod race video game I'd foreseen. You don't get many parental moments like that.

So many to choose from…..

The Rise of Skywalker – so awful if you want to watch it you have to do so intermittently with lots of time in between to recover

Wild Wild West – God God Awful

The Thin Red Line – the sort of thing they torture prisoners with by forcing them to watch

Another Man, Another Chance – proof that James Caan's acting career was over

Gods & Generals is the one DVD I smashed so that I wouldn't accidentally watch it again.

I went to the theater a few weeks ago to see "The Green Knight". It was the worse movie I ever saw in my life!!! I wanted to run out so many times but I sat there hoping something intelligent would happen that I could understand at least the plot. But NO! Very stupid and massively unintelligent! I couldn't figure out what was going on! I've never had that kind of reaction even to what I considered a bad movie in my life.

The new Star Trek reboot movies.

Star Wars: Episode VII – The Force Awakens (2015) and the ones that follow it.

Thanks J.J. Abrams for destroying both franchises.

Braveheart! A complete crock of s**t from start to finish.

Haven't been to a movie theater in decades.

Seems as if I ain't missed much…

Still thinking of nominating those LoTR movies.

Sorry, love the LotR stuff. But if you want to add the third movie of PJ's Hobbit travesty, you have my vote. The first two were at least watchable. That third one… bleh.

Avatar. I suppose the first three minutes of the movie shouldn't be banned, but after everyone in the audience can write the rest of the movie for themselves, they should not have to watch teh rest of it.

Top Gun. To be fair, I've never seen it. I have however, seen all of it in clips out of sequence. Bleh. Pilots. Who [explitive deleted] cares?

American Graffitti – Why do people like this drivel>

To Kill a Mockingbird. Read the book.

The Grapes of Wrath. Read the book.

You have to imagine the night life of Sierra Vista/Fort Huachuca AZ to think how bad that makes the movie. I have been there for about a year in total between 1980 and 1990.

Many good choices here, I do like Gods and Generals, mostly because I am aware that my ACW historical knowledge lacks enough detail to make me upset with it.
Probably why I hate MASH, Fury, Thin Red Line, and Kellys Heroes so much, I know too much about the period to like the movies.

Silence of the Lambs is an awful movie. I hate movies where evil triumphs.

Mike Bunkermeister Creek
Bunker Talk blog

Wait, what! They killed Luke Skywalker! You Bastards! Didn't know, never seen the movie. What is it with killing off main characters and blowing up planets? I wish Lucas had never sold it to Disney. I take back everything I ever said about the prequels.

Anything by Quentin Tarantino. I have too much self respect to ever waste another 90 minutes of my life on one of his movies again.

Any movie where the actors have been hired based on their physical attractiveness rather than acting ability.

@Old Contemptible: Technically, he becomes a Force ghost like Obi-wan, Yoda, his pa, etc., etc.. But yeah, it still sucked.

@etothepi: To Kill a Mockingbird?!? Seriously? It's one of the great movies of American cinema, and deservedly so. My advice is read the book AND watch the movie.

I've never seen TGoW, nor read the book. Not wild about depictions of misery, on screen or on the page; it just has no appeal for me. I did love East of Eden, though (the book… never seen any film version).

It's one of the great movies of American cinema,

Horses for courses. I'd rather eat my own barf after habanero tacos and craft beer with too much hops.

Acknowledged, TKaM is probably on most top twenty movie lists around. Many top ten's too. Then again, most of them lack Blazing Saddles, so what do they know?