"An Apology for my Bad Behaviour" Topic

Hi Last week my account got locked and a message I posted on the "How did things begin with? TFL Issue" was deleted in violation of the site policies.

As part of a response to By John 54 I typed out the following:-

"It is crystal clear it will not change his pov and it is better to just try and move on…"

So I sought clarification and it was explained to me by Gwen that the content

"is not appropriate behavior on our forum."

I asked for further clarification and Gwen explained

"Encouraging people to "move on" would be bad for our business, correct?".

So I explained that was not what I meant by "Let's Move On"

As I said to her: -

"In the context of the discussion both sides are entrenched and it was meant as a phrase to say let's move on and get back to what TMP is about which is gaming and fun.
So let's move on to gaming and fun.

In no way was my phrase "let's move on" bad for your business?

If anything it would be good for your business if people "try and move on" from the destructive dialogue that has been happening."

So I would like to apologise to anyone who thought I was asking you to move on from TMP that was not the case.

Thank you to Gwen for explaining my Bad Behaviour as she said

"but in the future you should be careful about saying things which others might think are advising them to leave TMP."

I will indeed and best regards and great gaming to you all who are reading this in strange times.

I missed HCon this weekend and I hope that next year we can return to some Face to Face gaming and drinking a few beers.

Cheers

No worries here. I took it as move on to a different topic.

Don

Maybe we can send our posts to the editors for review and approval. Once satisfied with their edits can post our comments.

Not at all familiar with that situation and have only seen this post, but fully understand what you meant by "move on". The problem isn't on your end. No apology required IMO.

On of the major problems with text based discussions (which people seem to forget) is that you can't see the other person's body language and facial expressions and you can't easily ask follow up questions.

So…"mia culpa" accepted, I guess, and what are you painting?

I took it the same way Don did.

No issue here.

Thanks.

Yeah No sweat ! … moving on …

Understand both sides.
1) That your original meaning meant no offense
2) That TMP might be sensitive to some otherwise benign phrases

TMP editors need to get approval before they start locking people out. I think THAT would be bad for business.

Hope I'm not going to get locked out now.

Holien, good to have you back – lucky that you were willing to engage with Gwen and sort out the misunderstanding , rather than leave the forum in a huff.

I would have thought the phrase you used was in common usage for its meaning to be clear – maybe, as WarWizard suggests, decisions to lock/suspend people should be approved by the EiC (or maybe they already are?)

I was locked out once and am not exactly sure why. Did not think it was an issue and just let it go. In time I was allowed back in. I suspect it was a miss interpretation.

For example, the word gay has a different meaning now then it did 60 years ago and old farts like me may not know what the new meaning is if it just changed.

Still not sure why I was locked out.

Thatssa bekuz alla yousa guise know speaka the Inglish twoaa the well!

(Yikes! I might have just admitted to murder in some small Ruritanian town)!

Andrew, please, that's "…speaka DA Inglish…"

Got to keep up the standards

Le Oups!

but in the future you should be careful about saying things which others might think are advising them to leave TMP.

but we can not KNOW what others "might think". THAT is the definition of MIND READING, something no human is capable of.

It appears someone on staff misinterpreted your message. Upon clarification, the proper interpretation is not a violation of the rules.

Gwen should have thanked you for the explanation and re-opened your account, as she did.

I don't understand why you felt it necessary to make such a fulsome apology because the editor didn't understand a very common and well understood phrase. Shouldn't the apology have come from the editor?

DBDD

😐

Yep. What DBDD said.

In fact that would make an interesting Poll question: how many people understood him or wrongly thought he was suggesting people leave TMP?

I've been thinking about it, and to have his account locked over something like that when he wasn't in the wrong AT ALL is just…ridiculous. I hope at least HE got an apology in addition to having his account reinstated.

"Thatssa bekuz alla yousa guise know speaka the Inglish twoaa the well!"

Andrew, I'm sure Orkz everywhere are commenting on how poorly you speak their language.

And now for something completely different. A man with three nostrils.

Welcome back. I think the vast majority of members knew what you meant.

I can't conceive of "move on" as suggesting "leave this website".

Well I'm glad you made your apologies in text rather than in some sort of uncomfortable hostage video.

youtu.be/Q2BDtdkyxFk

I don't understand why you felt it necessary to make such a fulsome apology because the editor didn't understand a very common and well understood phrase. Shouldn't the apology have come from the editor?

I've been thinking about it, and to have his account locked over something like that when he wasn't in the wrong AT ALL is just…ridiculous. I hope at least HE got an apology in addition to having his account reinstated.

Indeed. I clicked on this thread expecting a message from Bill.

Instead we find ordinary members being gaslit into believing they've done wrong and brow-beaten into publicly apologising for making valid criticism.

What we British coin as everyday language, phrases and colloquialisms don't always travel well to foreign shores without sometimes being misinterpreted unfortunately.

Andrew, I'm sure Orkz everywhere are commenting on how poorly you speak their language.

Is it possible to disgrace one's Orc Family even more than they currently are… I'm just wondering to what depths can one sink even more?

Good one though, Gamertom!

What we British coin as everyday language, phrases and colloquialisms don't always travel well to foreign shores without sometimes being misinterpreted unfortunately.

I don't think "move on" in this context is uniquely British; indeed, I rather suspect it was US in origin if anything. I'm British and I would have thought it was inline with the expression "move on (or along); nothing to see here" which definitely originated in the US although we use it now.

So I don't think the editor can claim she was confused by esoteric British usage.

DBDD

DBDD

I can't think of any situation where saying "move on" in a forum would mean "leave the forum".

To quote … ah … me …

Legion 4 12 Jul 2020 9:06 a.m. PST
Yeah No sweat ! … moving on … thumbs up

Yes, moving on does not mean leave TMP … it means … Go to another topic. More geared to the major reason TMP exists.

E.g. as I just posted on the WWII Discussion Board, about an Osprey book …
link

And as many of you know I'm a Yank … But I may have used a Brit saying … That is still OK … Yes ? 🤔🤫🤭 Can I say "Good Show Old Boy!" too ? 🧐

I was locked out once and am not exactly sure why.

Got ya beat ! Twice !!! Oh wait … this is not a competition is it ? 🤔😲🥴🤭 Never mind … 😁 "Moving On !" 🙄😏😎🏃‍♂️

"Thatssa bekuz alla yousa guise know speaka the Inglish twoaa the well!"

Andrew, I'm sure Orkz everywhere are commenting on how poorly you speak their language.

Hey ! Hey ! Them Orkese gotz feel'ns too ! Ya nows !!!! 🧟‍♂️

[Note : I just learned how to use emojis on my PC !!!!!]🤾‍♀️🤸‍♂️🤾‍♀️🤸‍♂️🤾‍♀️🤸‍♂️🤩😁

Legion 4,

How did I guess? 😇🥳🤩👏👍

And looks like your !!! Button is sticking?

Legion 4, mate. Yes, you can say "good show, old boy", but you will sound like an extra from Downton Abbey!

Just a quick note to everyone.

I can't think of any situation where saying "move on" in a forum would mean "leave the forum".

Please keep in mind that we've had several trolls posting recently about how "it's time to move on" and encouraging people to leave TMP for other shores, so I think it is perfectly understandable that Editor Gwen would want to have a talk with holien to resolve any issues.

Instead we find ordinary members being gaslit into believing they've done wrong and brow-beaten into publicly apologising for making valid criticism.

First of all, you're the troll whose account I just locked, and you're back already?

Second, nobody browbeat holien, Editor Gwen is about the politest human being I know. Nor was he asked to post anything on the forum by us.

I've been thinking about it, and to have his account locked over something like that when he wasn't in the wrong AT ALL is just…ridiculous. I hope at least HE got an apology in addition to having his account reinstated.

Aren't you making too much of this? His posting privileges were temporarily removed until the issue was resolved, at which point his privileges were reinstated. Seems like normal forum moderation anywhere.

TMP editors need to get approval before they start locking people out. I think THAT would be bad for business.

A well-moderated forum is GOOD for business – or have you forgotten the old days, when we were too lenient?

And looks like your !!! Button is sticking?

Or my big fingers ! 😁😂👈👉☝👆

will sound like an extra from Downton Abbey!

🤩 I liked the old "Upstairs Downstairs" series a ways back much better. "Jolly Good !" 😎

I've been thinking about it, and to have his account locked over something like that when he wasn't in the wrong AT ALL is just…ridiculous. I hope at least HE got an apology in addition to having his account reinstated.

Aren't you making too much of this? His posting privileges were temporarily removed until the issue was resolved, at which point his privileges were reinstated. Seems like normal forum moderation anywhere.

But did HE get an apology when it became clear the mistake was on Editor Gwen's part? Seems like common courtesy anywhere.

Note: Deleted post was just a screwed up duplicate of this one. Carry on.

Blackhorse MP – much though we like and appreciate TMP (and I've been coming here for many years), I think that we regulars know that apologies from the editorship are an extremely rare and unlikely occurrence. I don't fret over it anymore – I accept it as part of TMP's unique charm.

DBDD

Can't afford to lose active club members over a simple misunderstanding like that, I suggest.

While I appreciate these are ‘difficult' times for all sorts of reasons right now, maybe referring such suspensions for prior approval by the EiC would be appropriate?

DBDD,

I was taught that if you do wrong by someone, even accidentally, an apology is in order. Just a simple acknowledging of an error on your part, no need for pistols at 10 paces or anything. Just basic common courtesy. If one is not forthcoming I think that says something about the person at fault.

Like you I very much enjoy TMP and would agree that it has it's own "unique charm", but I don't think this is part of it.

Like you I very much enjoy TMP and would agree that it has it's own "unique charm", but I don't think this is part of it.grin

.

You're right but maybe it's now time to (to coin a phrase) "move on"?

DBDD

I've heard that somewhere before ? 🤔

Ordinarily wouldn't poke my head into something not invited [yeah right…], but being taught what words mean, and idiom, how they are used, are two very different things when it comes to 'foreign' English learners/ speakers.

I'm no scholar, but I passed enough high school to teach others who can't, I've run and helped several refugee/ migrant groups over the years, and even when not, non-citizens of other kinds, don't get abbreviated phrases and/or humour.

A major issue IIM is Indian taught English- it is basically 19thC rote, and they have very little (at least adults now) concept of how 'modern English' has evolved way beyond that. Hence the always calling a white man 'Sir'.

>>I can't conceive of "move on" as suggesting "leave this website".

In modern parlance absolutely not at all.
Move on/ out, get lost, GTFOH all have perjorative content/ intent and don't need an associated smiley to make them understood, to natural E. speakers.
These are the risks of the modern on-line hobby…
Now to resume our normal programming_
*cup *regards d

Mature civil input is always welcomed !

Naaaaw!

Guilt and transgressions are always assumed, innocence must be proved AFTER you get out of the DH. There is no jury of your peers.

Of course, Legion 4 could not have a trial by his peers as he has none. (smile)

Wolfhag

Of course, Legion 4 could not have a trial by his peers as he has none. (smile)

I find it hard to argue with that … 😁😎