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"So you're a Bond Villain...." Topic

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26 Mar 2020 10:01 a.m. PST
by Editor in Chief Bill

  • Changed title from "So you're a Bond Vilalin...." to "So you're a Bond Villain...."

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Comments or corrections?

VCarter Supporting Member of TMP26 Mar 2020 7:04 a.m. PST

So you're a Bond Villain who has a pandemic causing virus.

How do you profit off it?

If you corner the market on toilet paper what would they call you?

Stryderg26 Mar 2020 8:02 a.m. PST

You profit by already having the cure and selling it to a single nation. The auction should be interesting.

Rick von Roll
Dr. Wigwam (a type of tee pee, TP, it's a really bad pun)

VCarter Supporting Member of TMP26 Mar 2020 8:20 a.m. PST

I was thinking something more along the lines of Goldfinger only not so present sounding.

Frederick Supporting Member of TMP26 Mar 2020 9:45 a.m. PST

You sell all your assets and use the cash to buy much depreciated stocks during the crash that will zoom in value after things settle down

Kind of like Goldman Sachs does it

Personal logo Andrew Walters Supporting Member of TMP26 Mar 2020 9:45 a.m. PST

Profit is not just money. In Moonraker Drax wants to kill everyone so he can repopulate the world with perfect human specimens he has chosen.

I'm not sure the toilet paper thing was predictable. Plus, if you bought it, created the shortage, and sold it you couldn't make enough to make it worthwhile. Far better, short the market indexes then crash the economy.

Personal logo Editor in Chief Bill The Editor of TMP Fezian26 Mar 2020 10:02 a.m. PST

Toiletfinger just doesn't have the right style… grin

Stryderg26 Mar 2020 10:14 a.m. PST


robert piepenbrink Supporting Member of TMP26 Mar 2020 10:30 a.m. PST

Yeah. To be a proper movie Bond villain, you're either wiping out humanity--the parts not under your control, anyway--or threatening to if they don't pay ransom.

Practically, the money is in buying stocks at market lows. The whole TP thing, even if it works, just gets you known as The Paper Tiger.

55th Division26 Mar 2020 11:04 a.m. PST


Vintage Wargaming26 Mar 2020 4:19 p.m. PST

I don't know but my top tip is if you've captured James Bond in your secret lair and have him tied up, don't explain your plan for world domination to him, shoot him in the head.

JMcCarroll Supporting Member of TMP26 Mar 2020 5:40 p.m. PST

Get those free-kin sharks with lasers on them.
Release a virus that effects the G.I.tract, not the respiratory system. Then buy TT paper stocks.
Get compromising pictures of Bond with Margret Thacher.

Major Mike26 Mar 2020 6:53 p.m. PST

It's all done to pull of the greatest heist ever done. Since everyone, including the police, is social distancing, you break into the largest banks across the globe and clean out the safe deposit boxes. If an alarm trips, who cares, no one will come to investigate. No one except that pesky Mr. Bond, who is on the job after some interesting "materials" are taken from the London bank.

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