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"What's in it?" Topic

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Action Log

11 Jan 2019 9:22 p.m. PST
by Editor in Chief Bill

  • Crossposted to Utter Drivel board

11 Sep 2019 6:43 p.m. PST
by Editor in Chief Bill

  • Removed from Utter Drivel boardRemoved from TMP Poll Suggestions boardCrossposted to Modern Discussion (1946 to 2008) board

Areas of Interest


802 hits since 11 Jan 2019
©1994-2019 Bill Armintrout
Comments or corrections?

Personal logo Editor in Chief Bill The Editor of TMP Fezian11 Jan 2019 9:21 p.m. PST

Imagine that during your military training, you are provided with a small wooden box with the instructions, "Only open in an emergency."

What is in the box?

Winston Smith11 Jan 2019 9:25 p.m. PST


Cyrus the Great11 Jan 2019 10:19 p.m. PST


Zephyr111 Jan 2019 11:04 p.m. PST

What's the emergency…? evil grin

Cerdic11 Jan 2019 11:42 p.m. PST

Holy hand grenade of Antioch…

Personal logo Narratio Supporting Member of TMP12 Jan 2019 12:20 a.m. PST

A note from Mother asking for you to be excused PT as you've got a weak chest?

Gunfreak Supporting Member of TMP12 Jan 2019 2:46 a.m. PST

Total existence annihilation button.
I mean if I'm going to die why should I let existence continue to exist.

ZULUPAUL Supporting Member of TMP12 Jan 2019 2:56 a.m. PST

Button for transporter.

Giles the Zog12 Jan 2019 3:07 a.m. PST

Schrodinger's cat.

Palewarrior12 Jan 2019 3:15 a.m. PST

depends on the country I guess…;)

i)A Bible
ii) A legal document, absolving the government from any responsibility for your impending doom.
iii) A beer
iv) a signed photo of our glorious leader.
v) A thank you note.

Katzbalger12 Jan 2019 4:57 a.m. PST

A dose of gamma radiation and that serum they used to make Captain America, of course. Could it be anything else? I think NOT!


Dynaman878912 Jan 2019 5:29 a.m. PST

Nothing – whatever was in it was stolen by the supply pukes.

robert piepenbrink Supporting Member of TMP12 Jan 2019 5:31 a.m. PST

The modern US Army? A huge stack of very important forms to be filled in.

dBerczerk12 Jan 2019 5:32 a.m. PST


Personal logo Zeelow Supporting Member of TMP12 Jan 2019 5:39 a.m. PST

A medal

Cerdic12 Jan 2019 6:51 a.m. PST

British Army?

Backup teabag.

rustymusket Supporting Member of TMP12 Jan 2019 8:04 a.m. PST

A coin to toss.

Extrabio1947 Supporting Member of TMP12 Jan 2019 8:10 a.m. PST

I like the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch answer, but by the time you read through the instructions, the emergency might very well have passed.

Stryderg12 Jan 2019 9:31 a.m. PST

I like the coin to toss answer, but I'm going with a BFG9000 from Doom. One trigger pull and all your problems go away.

Legion 412 Jan 2019 9:44 a.m. PST

The Holy Grail ? We saw them put the Ark of the Covenant in a warehouse somewhere …

Personal logo Parzival Supporting Member of TMP12 Jan 2019 10:27 a.m. PST

A note reading, "If you had to open this box, you're screwed."

Winston Smith12 Jan 2019 11:03 a.m. PST


Bashytubits12 Jan 2019 11:31 a.m. PST

A 1950s can of SPAM.

Personal logo etotheipi Sponsoring Member of TMP12 Jan 2019 1:27 p.m. PST

Fresh underwear.

von Schwartz12 Jan 2019 2:32 p.m. PST

I like etotheipi's response.

William Warner12 Jan 2019 3:17 p.m. PST

In the navy it would be a back-up can of brass polish.

skippy000112 Jan 2019 3:46 p.m. PST

Free Vault-Tec membership and map of Vault locations.

Personal logo Andrew Walters Supporting Member of TMP12 Jan 2019 4:46 p.m. PST

The Sybilline Texts.


von Schwartz13 Jan 2019 6:09 p.m. PST

Just one small box eh? Could be a buncha "ludes" right?

Personal logo Patrick R Supporting Member of TMP14 Jan 2019 6:20 a.m. PST

A "You call this an emergency ?" note.

PVT64114 Jan 2019 11:57 a.m. PST

Atropine Injector

Wolfhag14 Jan 2019 2:48 p.m. PST

A radio that works with someone else with at least a half a brain on the other end that I can talk to that can send me anything I want like an air strike or evac.


Rogues115 Jan 2019 12:43 p.m. PST

Toilet Paper – or an Amazon Gift Card – those people are everywhere

Zephyr115 Jan 2019 3:41 p.m. PST

"Depends on the country I guess…;)"

Capitalized that for you… ;-)

Old Contemptibles Supporting Member of TMP16 Jan 2019 12:03 a.m. PST

A life vest.

Personal logo 20thmaine Supporting Member of TMP16 Jan 2019 6:08 a.m. PST


Karellian Knight18 Jan 2019 6:43 a.m. PST

A small folded sheet of paper, which, when unfolded reveals the instructions for how to close the box.

Personal logo etotheipi Sponsoring Member of TMP18 Jan 2019 7:57 a.m. PST

He he he … how about

- Instructions on how to open the box

- An inventory list of things to put in the box before deployment

- A 1348 form you can turn into Supply to get emergency supplies/equipment to fill the box

- A note from the guy who "reallocated" the emergency supplies from this box

- A backorder receipt for emergency supplies and equipment

Covert Walrus18 Jan 2019 5:56 p.m. PST

etotheipi, most likely.

Though I'd bet on- One forty-five caliber automatic; two boxes of ammunition; four days' concentrated emergency rations; one drug issue containing antibiotics, morphine, vitamin pills, pep pills, sleeping pills, tranquilizer pills; one miniature combination Russian phrase book and Bible; one hundred dollars in rubles; one hundred dollars in gold; nine packs of chewing gum; one issue of prophylactics; three lipsticks; three pair of nylon stockings.

Old Wolfman19 Jan 2019 9:28 a.m. PST

Shoot,a fella could have a purty good time in Vegas with all that stuff.;^)

Personal logo etotheipi Sponsoring Member of TMP19 Jan 2019 9:31 a.m. PST

One forty-five caliber automatic; two boxes of ammunition;

You forgot to mention that it is .22 ammo.

emergency rations; one drug issue containing antibiotics, morphine, vitamin pills, pep pills, sleeping pills, tranquilizer pills;

Or one bottle of vodka. Potayto – potahto.

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