"The Problem" Topic

War Games is escapism.

What we are escaping is present day existence, with having to deal with people, or the world others have created being one of the main causes of desiring to escape.

What we are escaping to is a shared fantasy.

But when we "share" the fantasy with others, we are stuck back with having to deal with people again which means we haven't escaped at all.

Perhaps the only true war gamers are solo war gamers, or perhaps the only successful ones.

Is there a real difference between my neighbor who kvetches me that my grass is a little long and the gamer who kvetches me that I use the wrong shade of blue for my troops?

I hate to be negative, and hopefully this attitude will pass, but after an experience I had last weekend I say preach it, brother. Mean people suck.

Paint your grass blue. That'll show 'im.

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There is a difference between people you have to deal with and people you want to deal with.

For me, wargaming (including painting, making terrain and designing scenarios for games) is energizing. Both solo and with friends. But I also like putting on games and playing games at conventions. The good greatly outweighs the bad!

Solving this problem is (at least for me) really quite simple. People who give me a bad experience do not get an invitation anymore, nor do I react to possible invitations by them.

Shared escapism can be brought down by any single person but it can also be elevated to unseen heights by any single person.

Don't play with idiots :)

+1 Snurl1

And I say give it a rest. If you want to play historical wargames with other people, you want to play with people who care about history. And since we are not uniform parts, some of them will really care about things which don't mean much to you. Please note that when you are a guest at some other wargamer's table, you may care about parts of history which don't much interest them.

If you met a particularly obnoxious example, fine, don't play with him again. But the basic problem is inescapable.

It is the human interaction which makes wargaming interesting, I can solo play all I want on the computer.

But like all human activity, some give and take is inevitable. As wargaming is a hobby and not a job, I do have the option to avoid people I find objectionable (unlike work…) and to game with people who share similar interests to my own.

I don't see wargaming as escapism any more than, say, going for a jog is escapist. It's simply an interesting and engaging activity. Nor do I find dealing with people on an everyday level a chore, so I can't really see the problem at all.

I'm with TlA here. It's a hobby AND a social activity, not a path to be a Recluse in the Miniature Mountains of Madness.

Not that I suffer fools gladly – wargaming or otherwise – but I genuinely enjoy my life, family, friends, and work.

Ditto.
Nor is wargaming different from fantasy football. I don't do fantasy football and they don't care for wargames. We are not unique. There's a heck of a lot more people who think fantasy football players are nerds than those who think wargamers are nerds. Why? Simply because there are more fantasy football players.
I have never seen fantasy football players agonizing over their hobby.
Escapism? No more than fantasy football.

Wargaming is what my friends and I do every week to get together. We are not unique. We just have a different kind of nerd-ness.

Wargaming is different things to different people. My current opponent has no interest in history but enjoys the competitive nature and mechanics of the game. It's a battle of intellect trying to outwit your opponent. I can't relate to solo wargaming. To me it would be like playing a game of chess or checkers against yourself.

Dogs are very loyal, and generally non-judgmental, excepting for when you refuse to share after/while eating in front of them. They do understand the concept of fairness.

The good thing is they rarely hold grudges for long, either.

I used to think I would never solo wargame, but after decades of grouchy swearing gamer adults (at least chronologically) I am beginning to think it might be the way to go.

I'm with Temporary like Achilles.

When some people seem to have constant problems with others you start to wonder if it might be them not the people they play with….

I always thought kvetch was to chat but am wrong; it's 'to annoy'. I've never heard 'kvetches or kvetched me' before though. I usually go with 'kibitz' -even though the American definition is 'to offer unasked for advice' the old meaning was 'to chat' Who knew?

I see wargaming as engagement rather than escapism. Perhaps this is a problem that has been defined into existence?

Funny enough, every one of my close war gaming friends also plays (or has in the past) fantasy football and fantasy baseball. I guess we're Double Geeks? Woot!

When one understands that Otto is using the royal 'we' this problem makes much more sense.

Temporary In Achilles has it down .
Wargaming isn't escapist to me at all- It is merely an entertaining hobby/ activity . Its a chance to get together with friends or a chance for a win at all legal costs tournament and everything in between .
No different than any of my other interests (re-enacting, competitive shooting, horse racing (I own not ride ), playing Mens 40+ Baseball, travel )
I think if you view it(or anything) as escapist you set yourself up for failure and to further go down that anti-social tunnel that you are digging

I like it because it isn't my work.