"The last word on TMP" Topic

ers!

He's going to get covered in seagull poop if he sits there. Just saying…..

Great! So if you can't hit an elephant, what about a barn door?

Aaaargh! We condone what our brothers have done …sisters! What our sisters have done.

Well, took a while to read that lot.

Actually, I lied. Didn't read any of them.

I mean, I could have read them all if I wanted to. It's just that I just painted something and I'm a bit busy at the moment watching the paint dry.

Please understand, I don't usually watch paint dry.

Only interesting paint.

And even then only if it's essential for the plot.

Sometimes there isn't a plot so I let it dry unwatched.

By Jove, I think you may have rekindled my interest in painting …or watching paint dry, at least.

She could have saved time – paint it all yellow and then use Magic Dip for shading.

At table distance it looks the same.

Although the optician was saying something about

"new glasses"

maybe…I'm not sure I heard it right.

Anyway

can I find a picture

of that darn old

tap dancing elephant?

Nope.

" …and ran away to the circus,
Off she went with a …

There's an elephant in the room?

Is it white or pink?

Well, grey ones are boring.

Boring, you say? Come on over and we can discuss it further …well I can!

Free upgrade, bruv!

What have I told you about keeping Breaking Winds pet squirrel in your room Manuel???

I am making notes, Volleydire, and your name will go on the list; and when I win The Last Word you will be brought to account.

I've got my eye on you Breaking Petal

It's one F in Volleyfire by the way. These foreigners, not as good at spelling as our brave chaps. Now, spell it properly or I'll have you put on a charge. Wilson, take this man's name, blasted impertinence!

link

waiting

Gotcha !!

'Ere Jonesy, Uncle I mean Sergeant Wilson says they've captured another U Boat crew! Isn't it exciting! Apparently they are a highly trained elite underwater spelling unit and they want to challenge us to a spelling competition. The ones who get the most words right wins. I wonder if we'll get the Last Word right and win. what do you think??

When we was in the Sudan the Mad Mahdi challenged General Kitchener to a spelling contest. Just before the Battle of Omdurman it was. Well the General he knew the Mahdi couldn't speak English very well, so he chose the longest most difficult words he could find in the dictionary. Discombobulation, that was one. Schizophrenia, that was another.
Anyway, they picked 20 words each, and the Mahdi he was doing really well until he got to the Last Word, precon..er preconce…anyway he got the i and the e the wrong way round and he was mad, ooh he was mad. He was hopping up and down, they do a lot of hopping up and down those fuzzy wuzzies you know, it's because the sand is so hot and they only have bare feet you know. Anyway where was I? Oh yes, he was really mad and he said to General Kitchener "I'm coming to get you with my entire army, and you will not like it!" And he stormed off, and after that he was always known as The Mad Madhi.

I suppose I'd better ring HQ and see what time the Germans are likely to arrive so we can get a team organised. I wonder if HQ can raise any other foreign teams as well??

Hello hello! Is that HQ?