"Embarrassing?" Topic

Are you sometimes embarrassed by your fellow miniature wargamers?

Constantly.

LT

There are times.

I might be embarrassed for them, but I'm not embarrassed personally.

Yes.

Also by other folks who are non-gamers

Many times… I felt shame for others, (smile)

Amicalement
Armand

Sometimes, but people on this site often surprise me with their generosity and maturity as well.

yes

"Wargamers"? In particular, or persons involved with miniature figures and/or wargaming? Or people on TMP, and/or other miniatures sites?

No. Sometimes irritated, sometimes annoyed. They are otherwise far too anonymous for me to feel embarrassment.

What about your view, Bill?

EDIT:

I'm embarrassed now to realise that you, The Editor in Chief, have had your OP 'adjusted' in the action log to the left of this page. YOU should have got that right first time!! Tee-hee, I'm just joking with you Bill

"Used to be, but I don't go there any more."
He said enigmatically…

I game with people that are personal friends.

We tend to avoid the crazies.

Not by my regular gaming groups, but at a show definitely.

There are times. Hygine and lack of style for me :p :p and there are times I embarrass them. Usually because I am very loud in games.

When I read the threads on TMP Talk – yes. In the company of the gamers I game with – no.

Yes.

No.

Abwehrschlacht +1 …

(exactly what I was going to add as I scrolled through) – if wargaming was like it sometimes seems on the internet I would have walked away years ago …

Phil

I'm sure I embarrass a lot of my peers a nd others, but they tend to overlook my lack of graces and form due to my enthusiasm :)
Cheers and my mates all know my biggest laps eh gents ;) oh and yeah there are some but I tend to stay away from them fruits too acidic :)

Never because of their wargaming.

Politics, cultural insensitivity, lack of insight into personal issues yes, but I tend not to play with them for very long.

It takes all kinds …

Once, many years ago, I was a customer at a game store, and got to know the owner quite well. He was a great guy and did a lot of favors for me.

He did not know I was a gamer.

He had a gaming section, with the usual drips and drabs of minis. He thought I was a model railroader (which I am in a way as well).

One day a few gamers came in asking him if he carried a certain line of miniatures. The gamer said he wanted to get intoXXXXX war, and was interested. The owner was polite but told him that he had little demand for minis.

When the guy left, the owner unburdened to me and told me all the horror stories of miniature gamers that a store owner could tell.

He said to me. "War Gamers are the nastiest, meanest, cheapest, laziest, most mean-spirited people I ever met. They won't do it unless you gift wrap it for them and shove it into their grubby little claws, and even then all they will do is complain and they will never be grateful."

As I said he did not know I was a gamer. A few weeks later I revealed that. He was a little embarrassed. But we remained friends.

I used to think that his opinion was wildly over-drawn and extreme, and quite unfair.

Then I joined TMP.

My own group is great. There's about a dozen guys I invite, depending on personal lives, of which about 8 come to any oen game. All great guys. People from both sides of the political spectrum. Never a problem.

But then there's a self-selection process, and people who don't like Otto games don't come back.

I suspect I'm one of the reprehensible ones to them.

Humanity is an embarrassment, no need to filter it any finer.

What about your view, Bill?

I always thought of wargaming as a hobby where people could get together in spite of their differences to enjoy a good game. Sort of like Snoopy and the Red Baron.

I am dismayed when a few people seem to seek out differences with other wargamers, or make sneering comments about those they don't approve of. It is counter to what I think of as the spirit of wargaming.

Not embarrassed by any of my friends. Sure we get the eye-roll from the wives or s/o's but that's normal. But we embrace our "nerdiness" and that is what counts!

Not embarrased, but saddened. Rude behavior, and a lack of personal hygiene makes me mentally shake my head and I sigh. Somewhere down the line, someone has failed…..

Probably no different from the average to be found with any hobby. I've seen behavior on a golf course worse than any simple non-bathing socially awkward convention anorak.

As in any group, there will be a few individuals that stand out in a negative way.

Non-bathing types, fan boys and the Nazi t-shirt wearers used to bother me, but since I don't do many conventions any longer, don't experience many of them.

Dan

At my gaming club, about 5%. At a show/convention about 20%, in other places about 90%.

I'm not embarrassed at them being wargamers.

I'm embarrassed at how immature, childish (and at a few companies I've worked at how unprofessional) they can be.

Embarrased by? No. Annoyed by some/many? (Das Reich World Tour t-shirts wearers being high on the list) Yes.

reading some of the views expressed on TMP? Yes, constantly

Cyrus +1

I'm sure I embarrass them more than they me.

Nah. And I think most of the people I regularly game with are so inured to my presence that they are not embarassed, either.

No

Not so much really.

reading some of the views expressed on TMP? Yes, constantly

that reeks of elitism to me

Gamers who devour snacks like they haven't seen food for a month can be horrifying to see. Mind you, they may later have to watch me pour beer down my throat, so it probably evens out!

I don't get embarrassed, I do the embarrassing in our group. It has become an unofficial, unsalaried position. This enables everyone else to judge themselves "normal" by comparison.

reading some of the views expressed on TMP? Yes, constantly

Ed: that reeks of elitism to me

Although the editor, of course, reacts to some views expressed on TMP by Dawghousing, snipping and banning …

I guess it depends what embarrassed means.

I'd have thought both editors and contributors were entitled to have 'standards' (and it isn't even clear from the above whether those standards are different).

Just because someone tags themselves a wargamer doesn't entitle them to a carte blanche … the vast majority I have ever met are fine individuals and I've enjoyed sharing my enthusiasm with them but it is naive to imagine there are not going to be issues occasionally.

Phil

Why should/would I be embarrassed by the actions of others?

I do enough on my own…

If you don't want to hear the answers Bill, don't ask the question. To answer your charge of elitism, David shared ideas and unpublished materials with me when I was working on a project. I've found him to be anything but elitist.

To answer the broader question, I'm regularly amazed how supportive and generous most gamers are, sharing ideas, miniatures and praise. There are those who mean-spirited and small minded, but I find them to be few and far between.

Not really, no. But I recall a new kid, probably a sophmore, who showed up at a game day at Ames College. Being interested, he was asking questions and examining the Ancients on the table. He picked up a cigar box, and for some reason, turned it over to look at the bottom. It was full of pikemen. Every single one of them hit the floor, and you can imagine the carnage. The gasps were more than audible. I felt so sorry for him, and besides the few that were more than miffed, I think the rest of the group felt badly for him too. He had the look of a gentle soul.
It was a stupid thing to do of coarse, but gamers are usually so eager to get new players into the hobby, they forgave him and tried to get him to stay.
That says alot about us as a whole I think. Some were mad, some were sympathetic, some were helpful. Guess we're just people like everybody else, huh?

Why is elitism always seen as a negative thing?
I've always thought it to mean you have standards.

link

Only once when a very drunk member of our club began to rage about how the other side was cheating in a table top game. He went on and on for about 20 minutes and then went over to a couch and fell fast asleep.

My standards of expectation are so low. When was the last time I felt actual embarrassment? I can't even remember.

Annoyance, yes, often and almost constantly. But I keep reminding myself that my standards of expectation of others (and even myself) are kept deliberately low. And that helps a lot….