"The Last Fifty Yards, Game 2" Topic

All,

So, with 2nd Squad having accomplished its objective, it was now up to 1st Squad to evict the Germans from their defensive positions in the village of Fondue. In retrospect, just looking at the 2' x 2' board below, with ten Brits and six Germans looks like too much. And it was…

I'd already played one game that took way longer than I expected (I was hoping to get four games in during the period it took me to get the above game in), and I'd had a few interruptions (I did not include these in the time accounted for), but I was resolved to play another game, even though I knew I was running out of time (how gallant of me?).

The board: the Germans, which consist of a LMG team, a German Sergeant w/MP-40, another SMG gunner, and two riflemen, are all behind the wall at top. The Brits entered from the bottom in three groups: the company Sergeant Major, SgtMaj Travers and three riflemen on the left, the Platoon Sergeant, Sgt Freduelve with the Bren gun and his assistant in the center, and the Squad Leader, Cpl Gwydion, with a rifleman and Sten gunner on the right.

The action starts on the left, where SgtMaj Travers leads his group up on the left, drawing reactive fire from Germans behind the wall. No one is hit, but the SgtMaj and the German LMG gunner are both hit the deck (green beads). The German LMG gunner manages to pop back up and fire at Sgt Freduelve's group (off camera to right), to no effect.

Then the German MG-42 (top center, behind wall and between the two bushes) rakes the Brit left: one rifleman hits the deck (center left), while SgtMaj Travers and another rifleman are both suppressed and forced to fall back (bottom center, w/red beads). Next to them is Sgt Freduelve's group, still in its starting positions.

Then things start going awry, first on the right…

Then on the left (the guys at top left are nearer the German positions, forced to the deck by German fire, while at lower right are several Tommies suppressed).

Ultimately, with respect to the Sergeant Major, things went a bit rough for the squad; to see just how bad it went, please check the blog at:
link

V/R,
Jack

At this rate, the major is going to want to have words :)

You've been playing pretty intensively the past couple of weeks. Still finding the rules are holding up for you?

When you finally switch games, I'll have to find a new spokes person :D

With all the shenanigans going on around here it's refreshing to read a AAR. And a good one to boot! (Anyone where I don't die is reasonably satisfying at this stage)

Thank you Mr Jack

Kyote – Yeah, that was a bit rough, but stuff happens, and they'll hopefully have another go at that German position this weekend.

Ivan – Don't worry, the Major's chance will be coming up soon (maybe not this weekend, not sure how far I'll get). The rules are doing just fine, having a good time. That's funny about being a spokesperson; I'm just having a good time and like to show my little toy battles to the world.

Panda – I haven't had much time to follow the goings on here, but I gather there's some sort of silliness happening. At first I assumed it was another deal regarding Mr. Tango (hoping not and wondering how that was happening as the Ignore has already been adopted). I see it isn't, but I'm not really sure what the heck is going on, other than I saw the first page of Sparker, Arteis, and John Salt leaving without saying why (I'll have to read the rest, I see there's around three pages now)…

Regarding not dying, there's always next time. But I think it would be more satisfying to me if you were captured by cannibals and buried up to your neck in red ants. But I digress… ;)

V/R,
Jack

Red ants…after almost two weeks of camping that sounds almost attractive ;)

BTW, I've been meaning to ask: The fields you have on your table? I assume it's some sort of carpet squares or mats or something?

"I no longer camp…"

And that alone makes you a far wiser man than I

The Sergeant Major is not happy. Against equal forces, it was likely to not be great.

Ivan – My much-made fun of hills are nothing but rugs bought at Wal-Mart, spray painted, and cut up. However, the fields are from Hotzmats, and I love them.

Shaun – Excuses are like Pandas --- nobody likes'em! ;)

V/R,
Jack

"Excuses are like Panda's nobody likes em"

That's right hit me when I'm down…back aching, backside aching, everything that still has feeling aching….camping is for the young or stupid and in recent years I only qualify in one of those categories.

But at least in my world a hill is a hill and not a piece of carpet.

Keeping it real Jack so should you

PS damn it man everyone loves panda's heck even the blasted commies love pandas (why am I trying to sound American …it's so demeaning to an Irishman)

Poor Panda, life must be so hard out there, with your Coleman lanterns and stove, your IPhone, in an environment where even children have no problems. Probably staying in a camper or RV. It must be rough. And how extravagant of you to be able to take off work for weeks at a time. Don't kill yourself, Panda!

And my spray painted carpet works just fine, thank you. It's part of "Improvise, Adapt, Overcome."

And, for the record, I will stipulate that everyone likes most pandas, there's just one in particular. Trying to sound American may be demeaning to an Irishman, but I find it's rather appropriate for a certain Canadian.

In any case, I can't help but notice it's been about three years since your last batrep. Any idea when we might see some evidence that you're actually a wargamer? More and more I'm thinking you're a closet model railroader ;)

Having said all that, I was unable to get any games in this weekend, but I did get a little bit of painting in, and finished up some troops I've been working on for awhile. I'll try to post some pics this week. Take care fellas.

V/R,
Jack

I need to get my terrain actually sorted out. Most of my stuff was acquired for scifi gaming so it looks pretty natch when we play :)

Any of you lot scifi gamers btw? The scifi version of Five Men should be ready within a few weeks.

Okay so my camping isn't anything Ernest Shackleton couldn't handle (although I did require my Swiss Army knife on a couple of occasions….okay so it was to open some beer bottles but it's still roughing it!

My gaming has been restricted to Attack Wing and the results of that we're kind of embarrassing. Everyone who played were piloting major ass kicking mother ships of the line except for me. I was given something that resembled a catfish (I kid you not) needless to say my mission to go where no catfish has gone before didn't last too long. It was a real laugh though. I brought XWing also and we're playing it tomorrow so if you interested in an AAR that's the best I can do. I can dedicate it to Junior Jack (I know he's a fan of Star Wars)

As for real gaming I intend (or hope) to try out a game of Weasels 5. I'm back on the 5th and then leaving a few days later to meet with some pals who are cpinv in north Alberta (we're in BC right now…Rockies…you probably haven't heard of them. So very little time in between but I'll try to get a AAR posted. I've missed playing and I'm looking forward to trying out those rules.

Anyway glad to hear you don't have any probs with pandas …nog sure which panda you have a beef with can't imagine you picking fights with one at the zoo so I'm presuming you don't like Jack Black or something

@Weasel I'd be interested in the scj fi version if they could be used for Dredd ….I really don't play sci fi but I do like to Judge people once and a while. If also be interested in a very simple kids fantasy RPG. Played some with the little ones last year znd they loved it. I know I could just roll a few dies but I'd prefer something a little more sophisticated

It'll be workable for Dredd (Enforcers versus gangs, mutants etc?) for sure.

I don't wanna clog this thread with advertisement though :)

Aww, quit being such a baby, Panda, and post whatever you've got, it's not like I'm going to be nice to you either way. I am interested in X-Wing, so I demand not just a batrep, but also a rules review.

And, I just noticed you were taking shots at my wife's eggrolls; you uncultured er!!! I'm not Jack Black, I'm Ben Stiller ;)

And I know you didn't actually use a Swiss Army knife: 1) you're sissy ass would be in the hospital, and 2) you said it was to open a beer, but everyone knows you're a Zima/wine cooler type.

Weasel – Don't worry about getting off topic ('clog the thread'), as you see we usually don't make it beyond the first post… How's the Pendraken troopies coming, by the way? Are you going to mount any of them singly? All my singles are on pennies, though I've used game counters as well. Pennies are cheap, plentiful, and sturdy (using Gorilla Glue from Wal-Mart to stick'em).

V/R,
Jack

Still waiting for the package. UPS has decided to leave them in Illinois for a while :/

I usually do pennies but I bought a bunch of bingo chips on amazon so we'll see how those work out.

Since I got a huge pile, I'll do some up on some team bases and a platoon or two individually for skirmishing.

You think I can't use my Swiss Army knife! At the age of seven my dear dad made me eat my breakfast, kill my breakfast and skin my breakfast with my Swiss Army knife. I even made my bed with it. Before we left for this trip I bought my seven year old daughter one. She's now able to take down a fully grown man with one in less then 10 seconds. Well a Marine actually but I reckon she's almost ready to take on real men

I'll see what I can do with a review of XWing. If I thought it might encourage you to buy it and go spend some time with your kids it would be worth it

And BTW I know you have a slight tendency to complain about the complexity of rule systems before you completely rip them apart until they resemble a game of tiddlywinks. Please try to play XWing as it is written its a good game as it is. You'll inevitably struggle to understand the rules but your youngster will help you along with the big words. For his sake give it a try.

By the way Weasel don't worry about getting Jack's threads off track; that's when they get good. I'd encourage it in fact.

And if you're worried about insulting him, don't. I mean don't worry about it.

I'd especially encourage that!

Great idea Blue! Has she played many games with you in the past? My daughter is desperate to play some games. She just loved the last RPG she played.

And for the record I mentioned the 'egg roll' comment to my wife and she exclaimed loudly "but you love egg rolls" . This is true. I love egg rolls. It pains me to admit this. I love them. So there.

Actually a curious fact is that I practically adore anything that ends in the word roll…
Sausage roll
Swiss roll (choc or jam…mmmm)
Bread roll (with butter of course)
Jam roll
Fig roll
Pastry roll
He list just goes on and on…

See how interesting these threads get when we forget about Jack's original content (whatever that was…meh)

But in case Jack's lesson has been side tracked by all this yumminess then let's have a quick recap:
Family=Important
Time Spent with Jack Junior=Important
Egg Rolls=Essential to Man's Happiness

yeah, I kinda do too.

Could we see Kyote's first ever posted batrep!? Isn't that a sign of the Apocalypse? ;)

Panda – Thank you kindly, I always enjoy a good recap, just to firm things up in the old noodle. Anything to avoid having to talk about, much less do something related to, wargaming. It's been so long since you've done something that poor Weasel probably hasn't even seen one of your wargaming bourgeoisie set-ups.

What you haven't yet figured out is that I've taken advantage of your 'camping' to raid your house; all your terrain and figures are looking quite nice upstairs in MY wargaming room. If you're nice, I'll even post a batrep with your stuff (cue evil laugh).

And I said 'camping' because our rugged Mountain Man hasn't even left the neighborhood, all his 'roughing it' has occurred in a tent he pitched in his own backyard! The neighbors have complained repeatedly to the Mounties about finding exactly two empty wine cooler bottles (with straws in them) each morning, following hours of some drunken swine belting out show tunes. And the incessant bleating of goats running for their lives…

And any man that doesn't like eggrolls while wargaming is a damned communist!

V/R,
Jack

Heck I'm one step short of a communist and I like egg rolls. So there's really no excuse ;)

And the incessant bleating of goats running for their lives…

Hey Jack …I don't think you noticed but you might have had some kind of post traumatic flashback during your last post (I posted it above) ….seriously man (or dude or bro or bud or whatever you cool Yankies call each other) if there's some kind of repressed goat (or looks like perhaps goats plural) memory then there's probably a helpline for that kind of thing

BTW whether you managed to break into my estate and past the hounds my war room and it's entire terrain contents are perfectly safe from your thieving paws; you wouldn't recognize classy gear like that if they introduced themselves to you after church. I would however be far more fearful of you ripping out our green carpet upstairs or ransacking my daughters Barbie doll's house for Marine accessories.

And for your information if anyone heard me singing in the back yard I'd have to start selling tickets. Especially after a few jars.

And my heart goes out to your poor wife…there she is slaving away in the kitchen trying to wash and feed the kids while Jack is upstairs in his wardroom shouting down for another tray of egg rolls! (Shakes head in disgust)

I'm lucky if my wife throws me some half cooked meat down into my war room (resembles a dark damp dungeon.)

BTW I'll post that XWing game later if you're good

cooked meat is for nancies.

Aha, just got my pendraken stuff in the mail. They really are lovely little figures. Can't wait to get some of them painted up.

Sorry for bringing wargaming into this again :D

Weasel please try to restraint yourself sir.

At least Jack for one will be delighted to have it steered away from random insults.

How do the minis look? To expectation?

I was going to start reading 5 men and I realized I left my laptop at home (growl) I noticed that there are several editions/suppliments available…

Could you give a brief overview. Or have you had any amendments to the original edition

yeah, the figures are excellent. I think I'm definitely a convert to 10mm ww2. Tanks are super affordable as well.

There's only one "edition" of the game, I just put up a couple of bundles so people could grab the supplements easier.

The supplement stuff is basically expansion stuff. Mostly things that didn't fit, optional rules or variations rather than really corrections.

So stuff like a random mission generator,partisans and the vehicle expansion.

I try to make sure the base game is pretty solid but I think it's important people can tweak it to their liking.

That sounds good. As a compulsive tweaker I don't see it as a criticism of a system; quite the contrary where individual and personal preferences between speed or complexity will inevitably determine the exactitudes of a system. Tweaking these in a system means there's something present in the fundamentals worth tinkering with. On my wargaming journey I've recently being favouring something that can be representative of small arms tactics and speed of play. 5 men sounds like it might serve the purpose nicely. If I don't end up tweaking something then that'll be a first for me :)

Good to hear the 10mm are doing it for you. I've way too many 15mm to bother changing besides I'd never hear the end of it from Muggins here.

But for the love of all that is good in the world please please regain from using carpets for hills…he'll feel vindicated in his evil ways

"Refrain" not "regain" I hate iPhone's psychic word forecasting…

Don't worry about the carpets, Ivan, Panda's just mad because I'm a visionary!

And did you just call me a Muggins? You son of a bitch! I don't know about you Canadians, but in Texas that's a hanging offense.

And Ivan, I not only hate communists, but everyone else on the entire earth that doesn't think, act, walk, talk, and believe exactly as I do.

Unless they're willing to talk to me about wargaming. Hey, there's just not enough of us around for me to be as selective as I'd like ;)

I even waste time piddling around with a Canadian wannabe-Irishman that has beautiful little 'bands' of 28mm soldiers that he puts on the table to simulate stimulating conversations between ideologically divergent foes… And an old Hippie Coot that, as near as I can tell, doesn't actually play wargames, but monitors TMP 24 hours a day and comments on every other thread ;)

I s'pose it really does take all types.

V/R,
Jack

I called you "Muggins" not a muggins or the Muggins or a troop of muggins…

I have no idea if Canadians use the term but where I come from we use it to describe well if the law in Texas demands only the death penalty then its meaning is probably worse in Ireland.

BTW I meet quite a number of you US folks up here in Canada and I noticed your Geography is not exactly your strong point (neither is maths, history….I digress) so this may be a little difficult for you to completely understand but Canada is a different country to Ireland. I was born in Ireland, lived in Ireland up till 3 years ago and then I flew in a big plane (the type that flies). And now I live in Canada…jeez

Marines being selective with whom they communicate…the Marines I was "lucky" (snigger) enough to know would have their parole officer control all that

Anyway lets have a ×@#&€ AAR already…we're obviously not hanging around here for your sparkling personality….and no more excuses…
excuses are like Marines….everyone has o…nobody likes th….well they stink

Jack congrats on becoming fully fledged member but I noticed you've no avatar icon….let me provide you with some very suited ones for you.

Remember you can only choose one!

Of course Id recommend any of your facebook photos…cant help but notice a recurring theme in your photos:

link

I must hand it to you, it's hilarious that you found pics of US Marines with goats.

I imagine the rest of the photos are from your personal harem?

V/R,
Jack

Join the Marines they said…
See the world they said…
Meet new interesting people….

It's nice to see Marines enjoying there work…the guy in the first photo really has his hands full must have been your mentor

BtW I don't deserve any credit finding Marine/goat photos any Marine website has dozens and dozens. The problem was finding any suited to a family site like TMP…I needed to say the Rosary after seeing some of those images…

BTW do you notice that on an iPhone Ivan's icon of his cat looks like the black horned Lord of Darkness. Kind of eerie communicating with him to be honest…I'd like a photo with a more defined cat image so I don't feel like I'm talking wargames with the Devil….

Or Batman after he's let himself go a bit

As you can tell I've waaaaay too much time on my hands since we got to this beach area…I'm kind of going crazy

Yes, I see. First, that had to take a lot of time to Photoshop yourself out from behind all those goats, then you've posted three times in a row.

Shoulda brought your minis.

V/R,
Jack

Holy **** you guys are hilarious :)
I always figured the goats were a southern thing but hey, back in Denmark, we made that stuff legal.
Got us a lot of German tourists too.

And yes, the cat is evil. Sheer evil. He also might actually be the one typing.

You're gonna get him all excited.

War Panda – you need to get out more. Or at least out more to somewhere different.

And this eggroll thing. Now, I always thought they were rolls with egg but I had to look it up. US eggrolls are not what I assumed eggrolls are. I thought they might actually have egg in it. I was thinking something more along an egg and bacon roll (very partial to these!) but I think it may be what I, in a real country, would call a spring roll. Am I off-base?

…and I have too much 20mm and a average 6mm collection for WW2 to get into another scale! So 10mm is not entering into my house, just in case I get tempted.

"War Panda- You need to get out more"

Shaun I'm 'let' out waaay too often for some peoples liking ;)

The egg-rolls that are so passionately being discussed here (it says.a lot about this bunch that wargames hardly get a mention but egg rolls and goats really seem to get the pulses racing. ;-) are the oriental type of egg roll…I get mine from the local Chinese restaurant but Jack (the lucky blighter) has his home made and supplied by the tray load as he plays his games. His idea of 'minding the kids' is actually playing a wargame while his poor kids hand feed him with large quantities of egg-rolls. The name egg-roll is quite deceptive actually as there's no real obvious presence of eggs (its name is derived from the eventual shape of someone vwho eats too many …their physical shape resembles an egg while their only movement available is to roll (if you find some recent photos of Jack I bet youll see what I mean) but more of a very light deep fried crispy batter with various veg meat combinations available; they really are quite delicious.

Personally I think the presence of Ivan or the 'Horny One" or maybe the "Horned One" (after his icon of his cat which on my iPhone looks exactly like a gothic horned black demon) despite this fairly unnerving and rather sinister image he actually brings a real authentic wargaming sophistication to the group. Jack try's to play this part;playing all these games under the pretence of loving the hobby but the dogs on the street know it's to give him the opportunity to do his two favourite things: eat egg rolls and ahem 'talk' goats (well almost two of his favourite things)

As for Blue well I see he's got back onto TMP politics recently so we don't matter to him any longer just trying to win Jack's votes by occasionally mentioning his 15mm goat collection…the sad thing Shaun is that it might just work.

Glad to hear you're not considering the evils of 10mm; it would be only a matter of time before you were playing on your grandmothers carpet …best stay away from the dark side ofvthe force

Definitely rolling with "The horny one".

That's great Blue I love when the kids take an interest. Hopefully it will continue to when they'll be old enough to play.

Ivan, I hereby knight you Sir Ivan of Oregon the Horny One…only prob is that Jack I hear goes by this call sign at a certain Texan club so if you ever want to join the Lone Star Goat Club you won't be able to use it but probably better to stay away from there anyhows….

This is going too far, gentlemen! Panda is even stalking me on Facebook! It seems his fawning adoration is turning to discontent given my gentle brushing back of his awkward romantic advances!

See: "…only movement available is to roll (if you find some recent photos of Jack I bet youll see what I mean)." You simply say 'no' to him, and the fangs come out!

You bastard! I used to be in really good shape! And then you make fun of my hills again! Then you impugn my incredibly awesome number of batreps and reasons for gaming! You're going to pay, Panda!

And Kyote, I can no longer associate with you on TMP now that I know that YOU were the one that started the 'Needs More Boobies' board! (see, two vicious rumors in one post!)

And they are spring rolls, I only called them egg rolls because I figured none of you would have heard of them otherwise. I didn't mean to insinuate you're not cultured, but I would refer you to some of these posts/threads and call them 'subtle clues.' ;)

I need to think of a vicious rumor to start about Ivan. And I don't think I can about Shaun, he's just too nice to everyone. Except Panda, but that's understandable.

V/R,
Jack

Maybe you're volunteering to be the special character in the next supplement ;)

Yes we can all see that Jack is the special one alright…special needs more like.

My niece has being using my super-d-duper iPhone (don't get me started on those hemroids ….they're a pain in the arse…get it) to keep in touch with family in Ireland but when she logs into Facebook she notifies me that strange 'goat guy' is posting you again.

No ….was a great pic of baby though :)

Anyway Jack try to stay focused ok …no more delusions of everyone (including all creatures great and small) loving you .and stalking you..the truth is probably quite different.

Hey and don't be fooled by Shaun…I've figured him out long ago…he's the intelligent one who acts all friendly lulling you into a false sense of security; all the while he's probing patiently for a weakness . Yep he's the cold calculated killer type… Underestimate him at your peril…speaking of pearls…that's all you're getting tonight

God bless

Yes we can all see that Jack is the special one alright…special needs more like.

My niece has being using my super-d-duper iPhone (don't get me started on those hemroids ….they're a pain in the arse…get it) to keep in touch with family in Ireland but when she logs into Facebook she notifies me that strange 'goat guy' is posting you again.

No ….was a great pic of baby though :)

Anyway Jack try to stay focused ok …no more delusions of everyone (including all creatures great and small) loving you .and stalking you..the truth is probably quite different.

Hey and don't be fooled by Shaun…I've figured him out long ago…he's the intelligent you who acts all friendly lulling you into a false spence of security all the while he's probing for a weakness . Yep he's the cold calculated killer type… Underestimate him at your peril…speaking of pearls…that's all you're getting tonight

God bless

I keep the bodies in vats of acid under the house. Does that make me a bad person :-)

Are we all here because we are not gaming? First one to game loses! I am actually a third of the way writing up the NUTS! game I played in late June…that I started writing up on Sunday.

Thank you Jack for calling me nice. I won't say what I was going to about your hills/carpet/you can call them what you want.

The guys got a swimming pool, a lifetime membership of the Lone Star Goats Club and lives on Egg Rolls And Bacardi breezers -the gig lives like a Kung: let him buy his own hills and some new carpet for the house while he's at it…

The gig lives like a Kung … I like it …