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"Most Flatulent Army" Topic


29 Posts

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04 Jun 2015 5:07 p.m. PST
by Editor in Chief Bill

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4,198 hits since 12 Dec 2011
©1994-2019 Bill Armintrout
Comments or corrections?

flooglestreet12 Dec 2011 6:04 a.m. PST

Who cut the cheese? The US Army in the 19th century seems to have subsisted on beans. Eric Maria Remarque remarks that soldiers are on intimate terms with their alimentary systems, suggesting Germany in WWI. The Old Fart Meister seems attached to the 7YW. I believe I passed more gas eating MREs then C rations. That gives us
US Army 19th Century
German Army WWI
Generic 7YW
US Army modern

zippyfusenet12 Dec 2011 6:19 a.m. PST

Peas, peas, peas, peas,
Eatin' goober peas.
Goodness, how delicious!
Eatin' goober peas.

"You'ns got such a nice horse, an' you'uns got such a nice 'newniform, an you'ns look like yore bowels was so regular…" CSA POW to Federal cavalryman.

vojvoda12 Dec 2011 6:24 a.m. PST

We lived on beans and rice in El Salvador for about four months. In combination the two can give you all the complex amino acids to support life. We did eat the occasional Iguana if we shot one.
VR
James Mattes

skippy0001 Supporting Member of TMP12 Dec 2011 6:26 a.m. PST

1. Mexican Army
2. Italian Army
3. German Army
The British Army hasn't a 'odor' in this regard.

justBill12 Dec 2011 7:11 a.m. PST

The private army of Hedley Lamar

Feet up now12 Dec 2011 7:54 a.m. PST

The Mongols,I hear it is very windy on the steppes.

mgdavey12 Dec 2011 7:57 a.m. PST

What about the Toot-tonic Knights?

meledward2312 Dec 2011 8:33 a.m. PST

The one commanded by the guy right behind me at the last tournament. That army was foul and about choked the whole room out. I think he won by default, everyone cleared out.

DeanMoto12 Dec 2011 8:57 a.m. PST

They'd be violating smell discipline.

tberry740312 Dec 2011 9:31 a.m. PST

Beans, beans the musical fruit.
The more you eat the more to toot.

Perris070712 Dec 2011 9:59 a.m. PST

The French forces occupying the castle in Monty Python and the Holy Grail.

epturner Supporting Member of TMP12 Dec 2011 10:52 a.m. PST

I think JustBill has the winner on this one.

Eric

kreoseus212 Dec 2011 12:31 p.m. PST

The vikings considered basking shark a delicacy. You buried it under stones/sand to ripen until the liver exploded. It was then probably rather tangy, as I imagine the vapours it would later produce.

uruk hai12 Dec 2011 1:31 p.m. PST

'I fart in your general direction……' Say no more!

Mister X12 Dec 2011 1:32 p.m. PST

Those viking ate extremely nasty rotten shark. Why didn't go into ordinary areas of culinary design?

Personal logo sneakgun Supporting Member of TMP12 Dec 2011 1:39 p.m. PST

Korean, they consume vast amounts of fermented cabbage – kimchi!!

Rogues112 Dec 2011 1:42 p.m. PST

Whatever Armies that will fight in my basement on 30 December when I make the once a year mistake of serving Bean soup to 20 or so men who cannot and should not eat it (including epturner). Hang time is measured in days and weeks, not minutes or hours. Come to think of it maybe a menu replan should be in order.

Love the Blazing Saddles and Monty Python references

flooglestreet12 Dec 2011 3:33 p.m. PST

Rogues1 Do you live in or near the Bronx NY? If so, could I do some end of year gaming with you?

number412 Dec 2011 4:04 p.m. PST

The French Army wins! YouTube link (barracks scene at 4 minutes in) Hilarious ending!

Rogues112 Dec 2011 4:33 p.m. PST

flooglestreet – sorry live outside of Philly.

May I be the first to wish for everyone to find a great game to take them into the New Year, and whatever you do don't roll like epturner or I do (especially when we are together). Happy Holidays!

John the OFM12 Dec 2011 7:40 p.m. PST

Tonight I had kielbasa, sauerkraut, hash browns, broccoli and beer.
I will now be leaving my computer to paint the British, err, Americans, err Provincials for my upcoming Battle of Shrubbery Run, the decisive battle of Buick's Rebellion.
I will have the WWE Slammy Awards on as background noise, because the Monday Night Football™ game is guaranteed to suck.

I think this enquiry is pretty well closed.

BTW, not to worry. I have lit my pilot light.

vojvoda12 Dec 2011 9:25 p.m. PST

sneakgun 12 Dec 2011 12:39 p.m. PST
Korean, they consume vast amounts of fermented cabbage – kimchi!!

Surprising there are about 40 or so types of Kimchi. I have made most of them. It really does not produce the type of gas one would expect. My wife is almost a total vegitarian and eats tons of Korean food and never gains a pound. She has been about 120 lbs since we married. I have never heard her fart or pass gas, can't be the diet.

VR
James Mattes

Personal logo sneakgun Supporting Member of TMP13 Dec 2011 12:06 a.m. PST

vojvoda, I meant no insult, but when I lived on base the lady next door would do kimchi and the whole neighborhood smelled of it. Our neighbor when I was a kid made his own limburger, it took over…..

zippyfusenet13 Dec 2011 3:37 p.m. PST

I thought the key element of Limburger cheese was the big barnyard dung heap under which the hardy Limburg farmers buried their cheese to ripen. Yeah, that would add to the atmosphere of yer typical American suburb. Draw flies, too.

Grizzlymc13 Dec 2011 7:42 p.m. PST

German stomach Bns WWII – Imagine sharing a bunker on the Seigfried Line with those guys.

number414 Dec 2011 12:33 a.m. PST

Wir farten gegen Engel-land?

Grizzlymc14 Dec 2011 5:05 a.m. PST

No wonder Churchill wanted to respond with mustard gas. All fuelled with saurkraut too.

flooglestreet14 Dec 2011 5:57 a.m. PST

Special Thanks number4, you too mgdavey.

Didn't the bowmen of Agincourt have a bad case of the runs?

Grizzlymc14 Dec 2011 10:27 a.m. PST


Didn't the bowmen of Agincourt have a bad case of the runs?

Yes, but I have not heard that their farts lent wings to their arrows – perhaps an Inherent Military Probability.

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