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"How should Jar Jar die" Topic


191 Posts

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10,505 hits since 10 Nov 2011
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flooglestreet10 Nov 2011 1:48 p.m. PST

Assume Lucasfilms has decided to remake the first 3 Star Wars movies as slasher flicks and you have been hired as one of the screenwriters. Your first assignment is to come up with a death scene for Jar Jar Binks. How would you have him bite the big one?

captainquirk10 Nov 2011 1:54 p.m. PST

Shot by Greedo

Bob in Edmonton10 Nov 2011 1:55 p.m. PST

And, on that (remarkably non-wargaming) note, the Star Wars board is now turned off. I really wish we weren't automatically subscribed to each new board as it comes online.

thosmoss10 Nov 2011 1:57 p.m. PST

Cage match with Roger Rabbit.

Fifty410 Nov 2011 1:58 p.m. PST

;-)

He lives to a ripe old age and then chokes on his tongue in his sleep.

After causing the rise of the Empire of course.

Because, you know, that was a REALLY cool part of the story.

richarDISNEY10 Nov 2011 1:59 p.m. PST

You mean….
Darth Jar Jar?

picture
beer

Caesar10 Nov 2011 1:59 p.m. PST

If Lucas remade them, there would be more Jar Jar, not less!

leidang10 Nov 2011 2:02 p.m. PST

He gets captured by the guys from the show "Swamp People" and turned into dinner and some new boots.

Space Monkey10 Nov 2011 2:03 p.m. PST

He's a cartoon rabbit so the slasher uses 'The Dip' on him.

Micman Supporting Member of TMP10 Nov 2011 2:08 p.m. PST

With as little talking as possible. Perhaps he should be on Alderaan when it was blown up. Then we would not have to see or hear him again.

SonofThor10 Nov 2011 2:11 p.m. PST

Being eaten by Georgie the Hutt!

Old Bear10 Nov 2011 2:17 p.m. PST

Quickly.

Oddball10 Nov 2011 2:18 p.m. PST

Slowly

David Manley10 Nov 2011 2:20 p.m. PST

at birth

dandiggler10 Nov 2011 2:28 p.m. PST

Horribly.

14Bore10 Nov 2011 2:29 p.m. PST

The biggest mistake? something simple like "Where's JarJar?" "Oh he's dead" and leave it at that

M C MonkeyDew10 Nov 2011 2:30 p.m. PST

Die?

Heck no!

He should become the eternal Emperor. By far the most entertaining character in the series.

M C MonkeyDew10 Nov 2011 2:33 p.m. PST

@ Bob in Edmonton;

I did turn it off and yet it is appearing in Nappy's.

Appropriate on quite a few levels really :)

WarWizard10 Nov 2011 2:34 p.m. PST

Painfully.

John the Greater10 Nov 2011 2:48 p.m. PST

Soon

CPT Jake10 Nov 2011 3:02 p.m. PST

How should Jar Jar die?

He shouldn't. If these are gonna be remade, it will tick off the fan base anyway. May as well have jar Jar be The Hero and complete the insult.

Custer7thcav10 Nov 2011 3:04 p.m. PST

have aaahhnold go back as a terminator in time (it was a long long time ago --was it not?) and wipe out the seed of all gunguns so as to have them never exist at all.

me so just saying….

skippy000110 Nov 2011 3:06 p.m. PST

What else? A Light ChainSaw Duel.

Glengarry 210 Nov 2011 3:13 p.m. PST

What did George Lucas do that he should be so hated? Making bad movies is hardly a crime! I know generations of kids who love/hate Star Wars and endlessly obsess over every aspect of these stupid films! It's like they are scarred for life! George Lucas is not going to give you your childhood back! Get over it! Aaaaahhhh!

Captain Gideon10 Nov 2011 3:14 p.m. PST

Just for the record I am a HUGE JAR JAR BINKS fan and I'll defend him to the best of my ability.

That being said flooglestreet I had to comment on this topic which is totally stupid,I mean do you and the others hate JAR JAR that much to see him die?

To me JAR JAR BINKS is the real hero and all of you are real zeros.

Captain Gideon

M C MonkeyDew10 Nov 2011 3:17 p.m. PST

Go Captain Go! With you 100 percent on this one.

vojvoda10 Nov 2011 3:25 p.m. PST

Slowly and painfully, the reason everyone but two hate him is he was only in the movie for the money on a new toy, added nothing to the plot and they kept him around for numbers 2 and 3.


VR
James Mattes

Patrick R10 Nov 2011 3:29 p.m. PST

Barbed wire, gasoline, a blunt rusty hacksaw and a rubber chicken.

Stealth100010 Nov 2011 3:42 p.m. PST

Anything out of SAW will do.

flooglestreet10 Nov 2011 4:04 p.m. PST

Brain transplant with a KFC chicken.

Absorbed by intelligent sham wows.

Cyrus the Great10 Nov 2011 4:17 p.m. PST

Mesa say
slow and painful
okie day?

14Bore10 Nov 2011 4:35 p.m. PST

How about a cameo bit roll in a Itchy and Scratchy show?

Angel Barracks10 Nov 2011 4:59 p.m. PST

Off screen, don't give it any more screen time.

Olaf the hairy10 Nov 2011 5:02 p.m. PST

I was hoping Anakin would kill him in a fit of rage as part of his journey to the dark side.

He should get one of his stupid feet caught in some machinery and get pulled right through, and then someone should shoot what comes out the other side

Greg B10 Nov 2011 5:04 p.m. PST

Ebola

GoGators10 Nov 2011 5:14 p.m. PST

Nuke him from orbit. Only way to be sure.

flooglestreet10 Nov 2011 5:26 p.m. PST

Assign him to security on the U.S.S. Enterprise.

Supercilius Maximus10 Nov 2011 5:41 p.m. PST

In silence.

SgtPain10 Nov 2011 5:49 p.m. PST

Very slowly and VERY painfully just like the movies he in.

John the OFM10 Nov 2011 5:54 p.m. PST

He gets his ears caught in a helicopter blade.

richarDISNEY10 Nov 2011 6:35 p.m. PST

I had no issue with Jar Jar…
Just another character that is more kid friendly.
beer

haywire10 Nov 2011 6:52 p.m. PST

Like this

link

Wolfprophet10 Nov 2011 6:54 p.m. PST

Ingloriously shot in the back during some botched attempt at heroics.

Completely unlike General Tarples in the new season of the Clone Wars, who went down fighting Grievous in hand-to-hand combat and left him stunned enough for his men to capture.

Clovis Sangrail10 Nov 2011 6:58 p.m. PST

Quick question, what has this to do with the Napoleonic period?

Ron W DuBray10 Nov 2011 8:27 p.m. PST

eaten by ewacks then they all die of food poisoning

Flat Beer and Cold Pizza10 Nov 2011 8:44 p.m. PST

Alone… in the rain. Papa Hemingway would be proud.

Barring that, I'd settle for seeing him trapped in an escape pod with a Xenomorph.

vojvoda10 Nov 2011 9:46 p.m. PST

Good one Haywire!

VR
James Mattes

Etranger10 Nov 2011 10:25 p.m. PST

Slowly, painfully and off screen…..

General Montcalm10 Nov 2011 10:28 p.m. PST

I'm torn between as fast and as close to the start as possible, or as slow and lingeringly painful as possible.

Personal logo Der Alte Fritz Sponsoring Member of TMP10 Nov 2011 10:32 p.m. PST

Suddenly crushed to death under foot of one of the Empire's giant walkers.

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