"Introducing a 12yo to gaming / KC Game Fair" Topic

I have a 12 year old nephew who is bright and friendly but who doesn't have many friends. Over the years my sister, brother-in-law and mother have tried to get him involved in various activities, but it seems that he spends most of his time in his room reading or building elaborate Lego constructions. He sees his slightly older sister going and doing things with friends all the time and wishes he could too, so it's not that he's anti-social. His parents are very busy with work and a toddler, so I think he's feeling a bit lonely.

He's a great kid. They live in Kansas City and I live in DC and I only see him a few times a year, so I can't really say exactly what's going on in his life. I just know that I want to help if I can.

I was his age when I started playing D&D (early 80's), so I thought that gaming might be something he'd like and which could help him get some more social interaction (I know… in some ways that sounds counter-intuitive but maybe it will show him that the world is full of nerds, which I suspect he is :-). Coincidentally, an old friend from those first D&D-playing years e-mailed me recently about the KC Game Fair in November. I decided that I will fly in for a long weekend and take my nephew. I'm hoping something there will spark his imagination. It looks like this con has a good variety of things going on, so I should be able to introduce him to a wide range of (non-video) games. I don't know if he has the patience for a game that lasts several hours, which is part of what I want to explore with him.

The reason I'm posting this here is that this is as far as my planning has gotten. I haven't played an RPG in years and do mostly miniature stuff now. The main reason that I got into gaming is that I found a good group of friends early on to play D&D with. I know that getting my nephew interested in a game won't magically get him friends but I'm really hoping that it will help by adding an avenue.

If any of you have some suggestions or advice, I'd be happy to hear it. I don't have any kids of my own and don't have any experience with introducing one to my world.

Thanks,
Chris

The only problem I would foresee with RPGs is that they are immensely more fun with a group, rather than with just two or three. On the other hand, gaming – either fantasy, historical, scifi or what have you, only requires two (and can even be done solitaire) but is considerably more expensive – especially initially. And to be honest, some of the people I've run into randomly doing RPGs are, um, less than desirable (I wouldn't want my niece or kids hanging out with a fair portion of them) but that also depends on what kind of RPG it is. Visit and take him to a game store or talk to him and see if he has any interest in that sort of thing. What does he read? Watch on tv? What movies does he like? Those will help you decide where to go. He might like Pulp or Horror more than Fantasy, or he might prefer historicals or even (can't believe I'm saying this) GW over other types. I think that getting into the right genre for him would go a long way towards developing an interest, rather than just getting him into something for the sake of getting him into something.

Thanks for the suggestions. It's at times like this that I really wish I lived closer to my family. I'd love to be able to help him get involved on more than a once-in-a-great-while basis.

Agree with Sundance. Boardgaming would be a close second. Board gaming's where I started and I was doing plastic models at the time too. My first "miniatures" games we played our own "rules" with Airfix figures (all the kinds!) and Legos, etc. until we found Tricolour. lol

For social interaction with more boys. I'd heartily suggest looking at Boy Scouts.

Hmmm, that's an interesting suggestion Neal. I'll pass it on to my sister.

I've realized that this trip is really about spending one-on-one time with my nephew, which we rarely get to do during my usual visits. I want to make sure he knows how important he is to me.

Isn't RECRUITS a KC area Con? I know there are some good game stores in the area too.

Scouts is a good option, especially if there is someone from school (hopefully a friend).

The key is to get him out the door and with some "guys"

I would bet just getting to go to the con with you will be a thrill for him.

If you need to hit a game shop afterward then go to Tabletop in Overland Park. It is a good store but they almost never attend local cons.

FYI the hotel is in an industrial park and food choices are limited to a handful of fast food places. If you need suggestions for real food (I recommend the BBQ here) just ask.

If the con is a bust and the weather is not horrible, there is always the zoo. Also Science City and a railroad exhibit downtown.

Yes, Recruits is in the KC area, the next one will be in May 2010. I highly recommend it.

Thanks, Jana. I sure hope so! So I take it you won't be at the con? I'd love to meet ya.

I have to agree with the above statements, as well. My brother introduced me to wargaming when I was 8 or 9 wtih Richthofen's War. I was hooked. We also made up our own rules for 1/72 plastics. Those could be good places as well. Go to freewargamesrules.co.uk to see what they have in various periods. Most of them are fairly simple, quick-play kinds of things. My brother-in-law was kind of interested but hasn't been able to come visit, so this summer when I went up there, I took Wings of War with me. He and his 10 y.o. son loved it, but asked if there was a WWII version. When I got home I sent it to him and they played it non-stop for quite a while.

We have not decided yet if we're going. If we do, it will probably be Saturday.

My son got interested when he was about 10-11, basically through mucking about with my old Airfix plastics – mostly Napoleonics. I'd gamed with these in high school in the 1970s, hadn't touched them in years but miraculously hadn't turfed them, either. The rest is history: he then graduated to LOTR, acquired heaps and got into painting through that source. Decided to follow his dad into metal at about 13-14, 15mm historical, several periods. He has a good eye, a steady brush and an eclectic interest in history. He hasn't done much lately – he's almost 17, 'nuff said. But he's still interested, and I suspect always will be. Guess what I'm saying is to echo some of the posts above: try him on several different styles/periods etc, don't be worried if they don't immediately light his fire, and lead by example. If you have a good relationship with him, and a bit of support from his parents/siblings, he'll follow the leads you offer, given time.

Thank you for the suggestions everyone. I'll be sure to post an update after the con.

The KC Game Fair will be ther perfect place to introduce your nephew to gaming.

We will have staff 'facilitators' there for the purpose of showing people what gaming is and helping them get right in there.

There's going to be a little bit of everything so he can take his pick from boardgames, miniatures, role playing, we even got Rock Band!

I'll throw in another vote for Boy Scouts. I went through Cub Scouts as a boy. I am now a Committee Person for my son's local Cub Scout Pack. Scouting offers a chance for boys to meet, mingle, and grow together. With a little time you may be able to introduce your nephew and his fellow scouts to gaming and he'll have his own cadre to game with. By the way I think it is very commendable of you to take an interest in the young man at such an important time in his life. (Not a smack on his own family, but another male figure to follow in his life can be a big plus in drawing him out of his shell a little bit.) Best of luck to you both and let us know how things go. Let us know if anything in particular strikes a chord with him. I'm sure some of us on TMP wouldn't mind sending you some stuff to help him get started.

Thank you all so much for the advice and support! I really appreciate it. I will definitely report back after next weekend's event.

Chris