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"NEWSFLASH! CBPR forces near Bongolesian Border..." Topic


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Personal logo Murphy Sponsoring Member of TMP29 Nov 2008 5:57 p.m. PST

European News Network (ENN),"All the news, delivered with a European Flair, by a Eurobabe…"

CBPR Military Forces conducting "maneuvers" near border with Bongolesia; Officials say "Merely routine"…

(Sudekia) Tensions in Bongolesia already heightened due to the recent confirmations of 3 missing scientists and a large amount of the newly discovered element "Bongolesium", have been further increased by the reports of Military Forces from the neighboring Central Bongolesian Peoples Republic, (CBPR) on military exercises near the border that they share with Bongolesia.
Reports are confirmed from National Defense Forces Headquarters in Sudekia that ground forces of the CBPR have recently begun military operations close to the border.
Earlier this afternoon, a press conference was held where Military spokesman General B'unga M'bunga told reporters. "This is the first time in a long time that we have had reports of the CBPR trying this. If they think that these "exercises" are meant to scare the Bongolesian people into acting like an old lady crossing a busy street with cars that don't stop, then deys got anudder thing comin'!"
When told that at least one plane of the CBPR air force was involved in the exercises, General M'bunga scratched his head, and looked confused while answering with "Really? They finally got the engine fixed on that thing?? Well, you learn something new everyday."
General M'bunga then went on to discuss that he had been given his orders by His Excellency President-For-Life P'hat Daddee B'wonah in which "he was authorized to repel any invaders that launched into the Bongolesian countryside from their third world hellholes."
"And you know who you are…" He said wagging his finger.

Unconfirmed reports are arriving that National Defense Forces are moving into the area as a show of force against the CBPR. However, word is also out that since the area is rife with anti-govt. BARF encampments, that this may be the beginning of a pre-emptive military strike against the rebels and perhaps to recover the rare and expensive Bongolesium.
"And don't forget the scientists…them too." General M'bunga said with a smile.

President B'wonah is scheduled to hold another press conference tomorrow morning and has invited all European News Network Eurobabes to breakfast before the conference for private discussions…

Stay tuned to The European News Network as this story unfolds….
And now back to "Knightrider-II; The Wrath of Hasselhof"…

Mlatch22129 Nov 2008 11:21 p.m. PST

Dude, that newsflash just caused me to miss the pivotal scene where "The Hoff" discovers that KITT now has a built in breathalyzer.

Ed Mohrmann Supporting Member of TMP30 Nov 2008 4:50 a.m. PST

An uncomfirmed report just received at the Central
African CIA desk claims that the CBPR infantry has
has been upgraded from the OT Mk I slingshot to the
Whammo Sportsman.

Analysts brushed aside the report as having been planted
by Bongolesian sources in an effort to receive military
aid from the United States.

While unwilling to comment for attribution, a source
did disclose that a joint investigative team made up
of representatives of the departments of State and
Defence, and including NGO 'consultants' would 'probably'
be dispatched to Bongolesia after the new year.

wminsing01 Dec 2008 7:45 a.m. PST

"Bongolesium", love it!

-Will

Top Gun Ace02 Dec 2008 10:44 a.m. PST

I wonder if Hillary will be visiting, while on her world-tour, as Secretary of State?

You might want to contact her people about that.

Bill might be able to also, if you keep the news of the "Euro-babe reporters" on the down-low, so his handlers don't find out about that.

He's also used to be a big fan of cheeseburgers, so letting him know those will be served at lunch might help.

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