"Strangest answer when asking a girl for a date" Topic

Just saw some of these in Readers' Digest.

Asked a girl out.

She asks me a question. Jack, do you know what I am?

Did I know what she was? I didn't even know what she was talking about.

I wanted to go out with her, though, and didn't want to get the answer to that question wrong.

I look her up and down, study and scrutnize her.
I'm still not too sure, so I ask, hesitantly, "Are . . .
you. . . a woman? Is that right?

You know, she turned around, walked away and never spoke to me again. We worked together and she wouldn't even say good morning when we'd pass in the hall.

Two weeks later, she quit that job and I never saw her again. :-)

It was her own fault. She knew my sense of humor and that I wouldn't be able to resist an opening like that.

JW

Just as well. Sounds like it would have never worked out.

Hmmmm… the last time I asked a girl out was in 1977. Either my memory isn't that good or my dates were never that amusing.

There was a girl I asked to prom when I was a senior in high school who turned me down so I went with someone else. I ran into her two years later, didn't recognize her or remember her name. No wonder my life has been a happy one, I never remeber the downer bits.

Regards, the Gorb

there are only a handfull reasons for a woman to ask..

Do you know *WHAT* I am.

The only plausiable items that I can think of are:
1) A Lesbian
2) A "used-to-be-a-guy"-ian. (see Aerosmith for more info)
3) An ultra-conservative-Christ-ian
4) Your boss.

None of those would rank very high in the "potentially bootielicious encounter later", unless your into that kind of thing. <seinfeild> Not that there is anything wrong with that </seinfied>

"Is this a trick question?" would probably not have worked either.

The correct answer was …."high maintenance".

what about

5) a nun, and
6) married

Strangest one I ever had was "No, you're too short." OK, I'm only 5'6". But she barely topped 5'!

"Just 'cause you think you da baby's father, dont mean I gotta go to prom wit you…"

:-)

Aren't all questions women ask men "loaded" or "trick" questions? :)

Sounds like you needed a Twix bar…

Aren't all questions women ask men "loaded" or "trick" questions? :)

The answer to that one depends on whether a woman is asking it…

a nun, and
6) married

..or worse…a married nun!

Usually, they just said no or laughed in my face, but that answer always struck me as funny.

If she doesn't want to go out with you, one reason is just as good as another.

Ogdenlulimus probably hit it on the head, but she was still a terrific girl. I guess she was just worried I'd ask her out a second time.

rmaker: Also got the one about her not dating anyone under 6'0". That one contradicted me when I told her I was 5'11", so I asked her how tall I was. "5'10"." :-)

JW

How about "Sorry, I don't date wargamers".
Could happen…

This didn't happen when I was asking her out, but I was supposed to have a second date with a girl who lived out of town. During the week, she called me and said she couldn't date me anymore because she'd had a visitation by angels who told her not to date me.

I told her I certainly concurred with their opinion and I wouldn't be bothering her any more.

When I first asked my wife out she told me she'd have to check her calender. Two months later she confessed that she really wanted to go out with me, but she had been trying to avoid dating due to a lot of bad experiences, less than 2 years later we were married.

Strangest answer I ever got was 'yes'…

Well, my mates said it wasn't the answer they were expecting!

Could have been a soul-destroying demon from hell, who on a whim was mercifully giving you a second chance.

Allen

Could have been a soul-destroying demon from hell…

Aren't they all?

I asked out a girl from a neighboring Women's college in the latr 60s, for a second date.
"We are only allowed out once a week" was her answer. Who knows? It may have been true.

Ambassador: I would have been running away from this one so fast that I wouldn't have had the time to even come up with that retort. Good one though, nicely played.

<<"This didn't happen when I was asking her out, but I was supposed to have a second date with a girl who lived out of town. During the week, she called me and said she couldn't date me anymore because she'd had a visitation by angels who told her not to date me.

I told her I certainly concurred with their opinion and I wouldn't be bothering her any more.">>

"How do you like that MACE, huh, hole?!?!?" That would have to be up there.

Or, "Can you at least wait until the pastor has finished the funeral service for my husband?"

Good times, good times.

Major Kong

ME: would you care to dance?
Her: Sure…what's your sign?
Me: Libra!
Her: GASP! OHMYGGOD…your going to lose interest in s#x by the time your 30!

In High School I called a girl to ask her out.
Me: Do you like to dance.
Her: Yes
Me: I'd like to take you to the dance.
Her: M.A.S.H. is on TV.

I have come to the conclusion I only date or marry women that are insane, dont know what that says about me, but I sure wished just one of them had said no. Now that I think about it, if all the women I have dated are insane, maybe all women are insane and it really doesnt matter who you end up with.

Women who date you do so to get closer to your friends…

Who's bitter not me!!
4 freaking times in three years

I've dated a mix – some insane, some right fine. I just don't know until the relationship was already under way, wished I could spot them sooner. I have walked out on a couple that were so batty I wonder how it started in the first place. Fortunately my wife is level-headed, smart, cute and tolerates the hobby. So the only dates I have these days are purchased at the deli.

As for being told to get lost, it seems to be in inverse ratio to how desperate/feral the guy is. When I hadn't had a significant (read physical) relationship for several years women tended to avoid me like the plague. Once I was engaged, all sorts of cute women were winking at me. Feast or famine.

Hmm. The craziest one ended a drought. Think there was some sort of connection?

She didn't bring up the restraining order again did she?

Gentlemen, you'll never find one that isn't crazy, the key is to find one that isn't THAT crazy…

This didn't happen to me, but I witnessed it at the annual Christmas Party my wife and I throw. A friend of mine who we'll call "Curtis" was talking to a group of young ladies at the party. The one he was interested was a real hard bodied 19 y/o hottie who we'll call "Katie." "Curtis" asks "Katie," "Do you eat dinner?"

Her response, "No. I'm on a diet."

Needless to say, "Curtis" has never lived it down.

"Sorry, I can't date you, you're a man-".

I'm so totally NOT a man-.

Don't know where she heard that one…

Not strange, but it was a little disappointing:

"But you're going out with my sister."

"You're violating the restraining order!"

Succubus could have been a good response………

Or, you could have asked her how much she cost……

Asked a girl to the prom and she told me only if you lose 20 pounds. So I lost 30 and took her little sister while she stayed home.

She might have been a working girl,an assasin,an extra terrestrial or a blood relative.

If it's a first date,she could be all of the above.

After all,y'all are trying to establish a sound friendship
before you take on anything else,right?

So,one response might be : "I'm not sure just yet-about you or myself. But I think our becoming friends might be a good way of getting some answers."

She asks me a question. Jack, do you know what I am?

a good anwser here would be ' incredibly attractive, both as a person and aesthetically – and I'd like to find out more about the person side'

Read no further if you are easily offended.

A girl I knew pretty well, a real spitfire. Lots of mutual flirting over the course of a few weeks. I finally screw my courage to the sticking place and ask her out, to which she responds "I'd love to. (pause) I'll be in the middle of my period then so I'm not sure about ing, but we'll think of something."

Nowadays I'd have a witty rejoinder but back then, well, I just goggled. Which was her intention of course, although she was being completely honest too. What a great girl.

Jack do you know what I am?

My next ex-wife?
A quick one nighter?
No but if you hum a few bars!
The Best I ever had!

I could go on……….

Words to live by "Never date anyone sicker than you are'.

"Never date anyone sicker than you are"

Wise words.

I have dated people even worse off, it's a bad idea.

"She asks me a question. Jack, do you know what I am?"

Reply:-

"At least give me a clue – animal, vegetable or mineral?"

get it out of my arse

actually, it made perfect sense at the time….

"I think your wife would object."

> So the only dates I have these days are purchased at the deli.

Well, hopefully you do go out on dates, with your wife, at least periodically. :> If not, it's a good practice for keeping that relationship built up.

I remember being the one to turn down a girl who was trying to pick me up in my late teens, though she never came out and point blank asked, she just sat down beside me on a bench at the mall and started chatting. I was having trouble breathing, because she was smoking and I'm mildly allergic, but I tried to be polite. The exit statement when she asked if I was here with anyone, or some such, was "Yes, I'm just waiting for my parents." She left pretty soon after.

Hi Guys,

The "right" answer to that one is:

"Yes, I know what you are… a good-looking woman."

Say it confidently and sincerely and that's a winner answer for that question.

Now the "Do I look fat in this outfit?" question has no right answer that I know of. You can't answer with a simple yes or no and I haven't found a dodge or redirect yet that works with it. Ignoring the question or feigning deafness doesn't seem to help either.

*** Has anyone out there successfully fielded the "Do I look fat in this outfit?" question yet? ***

Shalom,
Maksim-Smelchak.

*** Has anyone out there successfully fielded the "Do I look fat in this outfit?" question yet? ***

No.

The fat question is best avoided by:

"Oh, man, I have to go to the washroom!" hold your abdomen and bend over like it is something of an emergency and rush out of the room. If you are not at home look for another distraction. ;-)

My ex-wife asked me that once and only once. I told her that the outfit looked terrific and that I loved her in anything she wore but that I am a guy and she shouldn't ask me. Seemed to work and she began talking to me again about an hour or so later. We both learned something that day.

My current wife doesn't ask, thankfully. Sometimes Japanese women are very knowing about what we men really do not want to be asked. Notice, I said sometimes.

"yes I would, but I don't think my boyfriend, who's a linebacker for a profesional football team would approve."
"I will have to cut you first to see what your blood tastes like". "If you can't pick me up in a limo, forget it." "if we can find a babysitter for my 6 kids". "let's get really freaky and run through the neiborhood naked". "your ugly, I'm beautiful, what do you think?" "screw you you @!&^%*$" "Go out with you? HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. I don't mean to laugh, but HAHAHAHAHAHA." Sadly enough, these are some of the responces I've gotten. Is it any wonder why guys are somewhat hesitant to ask a woman out? If your lucky, you get one out of 10 who are decent. At least at first.

*** Has anyone out there successfully fielded the "Do I look fat in this outfit?" question yet? ***

Yup. I say, "Danger Will Robinson. Danger" in my best robot voice and wave my arms. Made her laugh. Still makes her laugh after almost 14 years.

I count myself lucky.

You mean the answer to "Do I look fat in this?" is not "Yeah, probably" while you have your nose in a book?