"Would you build your own coffin?" Topic

My friend plans to construct his. Where I live a cement crypt (just a box really) is mandated by law for human burials. Inside the crypt goes the coffin. However, you can use any coffin you want, within reason. He is determined to cheat the local mortuary out of a few thousand dollars by constructing his own coffin. He has ordered plans and the hinges and other hardware and what's more he plans to make a matching one for his little dog too. I haven't thought to question him about that point. I mean, does he think his dog will die at the same time he does? Do they have some kind of murder suicide pact?

I have however questioned him about the weight of it. Knowing him he will make it out of some hardwood and being a very large man to begin with will give the pall bearers hernias if they have to lift some overbuilt coffin with his dead weight inside. He only smiled. And like a viking he claims his family have instructions to bury him with his most prized weapon, a thompson .45 SMG.

So the question is, would you build your own coffin? Or are you like me, and the thought of having that thing waiting for you in the basement makes your flesh crawl.

I plan to be cremated.

I wouldn't trust anything I build to hold my weight, to be honest, so untill Ikea comes with one, I'll just stay with the standard package.

With this kind of calendar advertising, I'd buy one.
link
(Definately not work, wife or kid safe.)

They can scatter my ashes to the four winds!

mjc

Leaving the lot to medical research.

x42

I'd have no problem building my own, and would not complain about the shoddy workmanship.

But a cardboard box or large plastic bag would do just as well. I intend the bits science does not want to be cremated.

Not a plastic bag, Wiig4aw, that's not biodegradeable. Wrapped in newspaper, that'll do.

Or perhaps stuffed and mounted and used as a hatstand.

No. Death is the one thing I will do in life that my wife will not be able to nag me to clean up after.

Nah, I never do anything ahead of time.
-Kle.

Another for cremation here-- my family has always held that coffins and burials are barbaric and a waste of money besides.

Building your own coffin seems to me like tempting fate too much. My luck I'd wind up dead right after finishing it, before I had a chance to play one last miniature game.

Not sure what I am going to do, just leave it up to the kids. As a note my brothers and sisters and I built the caskets for my parents when each one passed in the 90's.

Terry

Looked what happened when Queequeg had his coffin prepared to his specs ahead of time. Be careful what you prepare for.

I plan on building my own and have artist family members paint it. You can see I've put a lot of thought into this!

I have not given it much thought. If I make some sort of container, it would more likely be an urn than a coffin.

"Or perhaps stuffed and mounted and used as a hatstand."

My beloved mother used to say we'd have to do that to her, as we wouldn't know what name to bury her under.

We thought she was joking …..

Sue K.

Usable bits should be used, the rest can be burned. Waste not want not.

"cheat the local mortuary"

Why bother, you're dead Jim.

It will not concern me, when the time comes.

cremated

Cremation for my wife and I. We want to be placed or scattered in a special location where our family will come and visit anyway.

For our family, cemeteries are not condusive to frequent visits. Only once in 30 years can I remember going to a cemetery with my family to visit a loved one.

Actually, my current preference is for medical education. The cadaver, however, is the property of my heirs and I have no intention of messing about with their heads.

Like my father, who left a note in a file saying he could not bear the thought of being under the ground. We are talking serious lack of comprehension of the topic of death here. But the BS my mother and I dragged through because of it were just ing ridiculous.

The order for me is:

1: Organ donation
2: Medical science
3: Cremation
4: Someone holds onto the ashes until they can cheaply be taken to the moon and mixed with the lunar dust.

Viking Funeral for me…

Thanks, Hexxenhammer.

For those who might not have considered it, please consider organ donation. There are thousands of us who desperately need them and will cherish your spirit for the second chance at life you can give us.

And, of course, not all people in need of organs are as irritating as I am, so don't let my antics here prevent you from doing so…
--
Tim

Organ donation first, and then I'll either donate my body to an engineering study to replicate the Great Pyramid at Giza, or I'll host a Viking funeral.

After barely avoiding being ripped off by the local mortuary when my father-in-law died, I am not going to have anything to do with those vultures.

I have given some thought to opening up "Viking Funeral Cruises" where the "bereaved" are treated to an evening party boat cruise to the point off-shore where the deceased awaits in a specially-prepared boat that is fitted with CNG burners to ensure a proper cremation.

Wyatt

no