"[Bar Story] I ain't outta luck yet, buddy!" Topic

I need to give a bit of backstory on this one. The bar I currently work at is called "The Midnight Mine". On one of my first shifts, about two years ago, I noticed a beautiful blonde girl, and asked a couple of my co-workers about her.

I was told in no uncertain terms to not mess with her, as she was 'Brian's girl', and a friend of most of the employees. Her name is Steff.

I eventually met Brian, and introduced myself so: "Hey, Brian. Nice to meet you. I'm the new guy. Let me tell you how well the people around here have your back – when I first saw Steff I asked about her, and the other people here told me not to even ask!"

Brian was totally cool about it – "Hey man, I take it as a compliment. She's beautiful and awesome. Nice to meet you!"

A year and a few months later, Brian and I have become… not quite friends, but friendly. Brian's the only other regular who plays the Ramones on the jukebox, besides me. He works at the bar on occasion, and it turns out that Steff and I have some friends in common, so we all get along. But Brian has never forgotten my original comment.

One day recently he drops by the bar, a little giddy and drunk.

"ALEX!!!" he yells, "You're outta luck, buddy! I asked Steff to marry me and she said yes! We're getting married!"

"Aww, I ain't outta luck yet, buddy" I reply, "Half of all marriages end in divorce!"

Brian looked shocked that I would say such a thing.

"…. and the other half end in death. Good luck with that!" I follow up, smiling.

Then he laughed, and gave me a hug.

I love it when people get my sense of humor.

-Alex in Alaska

Good luck to 'em!

'Tacha made it clear from the start that there was a 100% our marriage would end in death. As I recall, her exact words were "I don't believe in divorces; I believe in shallow graves in the back yard".

My wife beleives in mid-winter hunting trips

Local woman went elk hunting in Canada with their husband.
She's beating the rap so far, since her extradition was successfully appealed.

His name was elk?

Great line – glad he got your sense of humor! If he hadn't – I'm sure we'd have heard a very different story!

Alex, what ever happend with the girl with the "smooth move" empty glass routine?

Excellent ending! Good luck to em.

Good move, Alex, glad he took it well.

Life is a journey.

Pity about the destination.

Alex, what ever happend with the girl with the "smooth move" empty glass routine?

She's now got a boyfriend, a handsome, athletic guy with money. The bastard.

I was glad Brian 'got it', but he and I know each other well enough to bust on each other like that. He told me about the engagement because he genuinely wanted to share the news, but there was also a little element of a dig there, an "I've got her and you can't have her" friendly ribbing tone to it.

My response was meant in the same way – genuine congratulations (they are a great couple), but a little dig, too.

-Alex

And here I was sending you pics of me drinking sangria last night….

My wife said once our marriage will end with Nitromors not divorce – she knows how to threaten where it hurts!

"She's now got a boyfriend, a handsome, athletic guy with money. The bastard."

Tough break. I was rooting for you. Congrats to your buddy though. Its nice to have a pal that shares your type of humor.

My wife and I are immortal. Neither one of us will die first and give the other the satisfaction of the last word.