""Dementions"?" Topic

I am an AutoCAD draftsman. I received an email today from a salesman at a branch office, sending me the "dementions" of a gate he wanted me to draw.
Jeez. How many times a day does he use the word "dimensions"?
Could it be that he is a fan of Doctor Demento?

You think that is bad – at schools here in Australia (at least Victoria, i cant speak for the other states) they don't teach spelling so much these days – as long as the student can get the message across, then that is ok.

What a load of stuff that would get bleeped!

obiously, it's not a normal gate he wants. Id be extra careful with this one. Especially if his driver wears a hood.

The "dement" is a unit of measure applicable to all detailed tasks, representing the degree of sanity lost to the completion of the task, with 1.0 being all sanity lost.

Sanity does return at varying rates. A task of dement value 1.0 should not be attempted without at least a weekend immediately following. If properly broken down and delegated, no larger task will impose a dement value greater than 0.5 on individual tasked workers. Beware the supervisor who cannot subdivide and delegate, however, as you may be handed a task with a dement of 2.0 or higher!

The "dement" is a unit of measure applicable to all detailed tasks […]

I so need to pin this to the outside of my cube. ;)

Cogradulations! You have a client!

I suffer from demention every so often. :)

CC

I got a better one for ya John! ;) started out a draftsman…now a civil engineer tech. Guy comes in to apply for a building permit with a square drawn on a piece of notebook paper and construction paper cut-outs for a house, driveway, and garage…in a page protector. The cut outs weren't even glued in place…and the guy is sitting there arguing with me about why I can't accept his "Site Plan" as complete. Makes ya wonder what some folks are really puttin in their cheerios in the mornin, eh?

Notes from my "Mentor" when dealing with salesmen:

"Never confuse sales with implementation"

On other words, don't assume the s know how to spell…

Yeah John, remember this is a "salesman" not an english teacher!

Speaking of great salesman stories, this one was told to me by a former co-worker. At the time he was a graphics designer for a company that did plant stakes. You know the colorful stakes that go in the little pots of begonias, petunias, tulips or what have you to show what the plant should look like in its full glory and splendor. Anyway, one day the sales weenie walks in and asks him to make a change for a tag for a rose or something. My friend said it would take two or three days. At this point the sales whiz chimes in, "What, can't you just hit the 'draw' button?"

Looking back at some of my scratch building projects, I do think I used dementions quite a few times myself.

Yep. Salesmen (and women) can be utter d1cks.

Unfortunately where I work as Marketing Manager, their idea of marketing is reactionary knee-jerks led by the Sales Manager just because he has worked his way up the ladder since he was a 16 year old warehouse lad. Apparently, he is 'loyal'. But that doesn't stop him being an unprofessional, reactionary d1ck. Oh, and he can't spell either. We have to rewrite anything that comes from him.

Who puts a salesman in charge of Marketing anyway?

Rant over – I'm off job hunting.

Allow me to explain the true meaning of ‘dementions'.

A ‘demention' is taken any time a portion of the object being measured is deliberately substituted for a measure of the actual object. For example, if you are told carry-on luggage can have a maximum dimension of 24" and you measure your bag as 22" because you do not include expansion pockets or handles, you have taken it's demention and will discover the problem when you attempt to stow it in the overhead compartment.

Dementions have, by nature, a strange and powerful grip on some people. As miniatures enthusiasts I can think of at least one demention which should be particularly familiar to devotees of our hobby.

Didn't Buckaroo Banzia go to the Eighth one?

Are those dementions going to conform to ANSI Y14 specifications?:)

I prefer GD&T dementions.

Just so long as it maintains the form-fit-function of the specified dementia, I cannot argue with that.

John, I think you should form a Kaizen task force on the issue and run six sigma on it until your group can come up with a solution.

Goin back to the original post

I use to chair the planning committee for my local council. One week I had a report that a development was so many meters from existing build. I had to ask "Gas meters, electricity meters or water meters?"

You might have to explain to our friends across the pond.

Missed out 'that' after explain.

Same problem here, Jeremy Sutcliffe. Co-ordinating a project between Canada, Japan, and Australia is a real bitch when the Canadian goes, "Let's have the status meeting at 0900 every Mon morning".

"0900? In Canada, Japan, or Oz?"

Sometimes, it really doesn't pay to get out of bed.

"You might have to explain that to our friends across the pond."

Thanks Garrison, I'd forgotten that our friend's across the pond were still using measurements based on the decree of 1305 by Edward I which defined the yard as being made of three 12-inch feet and decreed that the inch should be equal to three grains of dry barley laid end to end.

The metre is of course the unit of linear measurement devised/adopted during the French Revolution using base 10 and the decimal system while also providing the basis for related definitions of measures of mass and capacity.

The metric system is of course used throughout the modern world.

And of course our "cousins" might not understand the problem caused by the synonymous spellings of "meter" and "metre" because of their persistence in spelling "theatre" as "theater"

Dementions and dementites were the audience of the Dr Demento radio show in the 70's and 80's.

Easy there, WB, he's still on, and we're still out there…

I apologize for any slight to dementions everywhere. I've not lived where I could get the good Dr for along time and made a bad assumption that he was off the air.

Now to see if I can find a station interested …