 ochoin  | 02 Jan 2020 7:09 a.m. PST |
This topic was prompted by a comment from Oberlindes
on this thread:
TMP link You fired someone from your gaming group? Cold, bro. That cold. Whilst I find the term "fired" in this context to be strangely appropriate, I don't think it quite fits as the severance was cordial. My gaming group (currently at its maximum of 6 of us), has gained & shed a very few members of its 30 years of existence. We've never joined a local gaming club because we collectively like the idea of gaming with simpatico friends rather than risk having to game with people we may not particularly like. The ideal is enjoyment after all. Thus, rarely a cross word & our aims with the hobby are fairly consistent. So, in refection, we've "lost" 4 over the years. One moved, one lost interest & two (including the chap above) decided their aims and ours were different. I still see them at events from time to time & we are friendly. So; question is, how many have moved on from gaming with you and why? |
| Old Wolfman | 02 Jan 2020 7:53 a.m. PST |
One or two have retired due to health issues,ready transport has been one of my own challenges over the years. |
| Dynaman8789 | 02 Jan 2020 7:58 a.m. PST |
I've lost count as I've moved 4 times over the years, had friends move, one good friend had a brain annuerism and though he lived through it his short term memory is shot so gaming is just not possible, had two others die, another one quit anything but RPGs and computer games… |
 ColCampbell | 02 Jan 2020 8:17 a.m. PST |
We've had three die over the years, a couple move away, and several just stop coming. They are still receiving our gaming invitations but just don't show for the games. I guess our core group is about 6 players with another 3 or 4 who show up for scattered games. Sometimes player's lives just "get in the way" of playing with toy soldiers. Jim |
| ecaminis | 02 Jan 2020 8:24 a.m. PST |
I have been kicked out of a group. It was due to a series of misunderstandings. With family & church activities, then moving I have yet to find a constant group to game with. |
| Fitzovich | 02 Jan 2020 8:54 a.m. PST |
Interesting topic.
After closing my game store in 2001 and being completely burned out.I took about 10 years off from the hobby. I had given away most of my figs and was happy to be done with it all. One of my former employees invited me to a quarterly game at his house a few years ago and I thought, "what the hell" might be good to see some of the old folks. Had a good time and I've gotten back into it, playing each week with a small group on Fridays. I was also doing some games at a local shop this year, but was hinted at that my scenarios and GMing were not in line with what the folks there liked, so I am retiring from hosting games and will do more solo efforts while keeping up with the Friday group. |
| Tgerritsen | 02 Jan 2020 11:12 a.m. PST |
Almost always due to moving or just people falling away from the group in general. I never had to kick anyone, or been kicked from a group (knock on wood). |
| 21eRegt | 02 Jan 2020 11:18 a.m. PST |
I guess technically I've played in seven groups, leaving the first six due to moving for new jobs. At one point I could play with ABC&D, and also with WXYZ, but not at the same time as it was an ugly time waiting to happen. For the most part people left because of moving away. Occasionally due to changing interests, and only once for get mad and pulling a Cartman. "Screw you guys, I'm going home." So I suppose I've been lucky. Hope it continues. |
| Fat Wally | 02 Jan 2020 1:25 p.m. PST |
In my gaming circle one guy died and one moved on. I've not taken part for almost two years myself as I can't host any more (other than for my son and I) and days everyone else games are now impossible for me. Six guys still gaming regularly. |
 Sgt Slag | 02 Jan 2020 1:39 p.m. PST |
I played historical with a group, for many years. I have mostly moved away from historical's, but I still play fantasy with most of that group. Had a heated game, once, with a younger member, over how movement works, with formed troops (think, marching band moving, while keeping order…). Don't remember anyone ever being asked to leave. Some members have drifted out of the group. I think one was because a new gaming store came to town. They have tables available, seven days per week. He has become an organizer/promoter of historical games, as well as Star Wars games, at the store. He is getting his gaming fix on, stronger, and more frequently, than the group ever could! Another former member drifted out of historical wargames, after multiple tours of real-world combat in Iraq. I think it took the fun out of it for him, having lived it. Cheers! |
| Ed Mohrmann | 02 Jan 2020 5:17 p.m. PST |
Over the 50-odd years of our group's existence there
have probably been well over 300 members, with a
core of 25 or so. In all that time, only one person was told (not asked)
to make himself absent. Many of our members were college students who moved
on after graduating. Others left due to employment
relocations. And of course some of the older
members passed away. When a game day is 'on,' usually between 25 and 50
will show up to play. |
 Dentatus   | 02 Jan 2020 7:02 p.m. PST |
Small group of six, only been going a few years but two have left so far: one to college, other moved out of state. That said there have been a couple 'guests' who haven't worked out and one fellow who was constant high maintenance that hasn't been invited back. There's a potential new member sitting in later this month, so ebb and flow. It's all good. |
 etotheipi | 03 Jan 2020 3:12 a.m. PST |
Five years ago, my family moved 300 miles for my job (300 physical miles; 300 cultural light years). A few of our group were our children's friends (now in their mid-twenties), so they also have moved a great deal. And many of my friends were once colleagues from work, who move on a military rotation like schedule. Within that context, I am pleased to report that only one of the younger set (who moved 1K+ miles) and one of the more mature (chronologically) set hasn't visited for monthly game day in the last 5 years. Many of my friends who were colleagues visit my new location on a periodic basis, as I did when I lived where they still do. For other friends, this is a reasonable stop-over on a road trip. SWMBO publishes our game day to FB friends on FB, so everyone above is periodically hit with a tinge along the lines "I should stop by and see them". On the family front, we ended up closer to some of my relatives (including SOM and DOM). This either added them to the group, or in the case of SOM and DOM didn't subtract them, though SOM has become less frequent due to distance (but also brings his girlfriend with him, who is also a gamer). One of SWMBO's aunts/cousins who game went from a couple hundred miles drive (infrequent, unless they were already going where we used to live) to a little less than one hour, now making nearly every event. Of course, we have had people show up for one or two sessions, then decide this wasn't their scene. That's also perfectly OK … if you do everything you do with everyone you know, you might want to consider expanding your horizons. |
| korsun0 | 03 Jan 2020 7:04 a.m. PST |
We are down to four, from 6-8 what with people moving on. We'd like to recruit more but had no luck. We've had some mupets in our time (strangely professional army officers) but never excluded or asked anyone to leave.
We need people, just no one around. |
| ochoin | 03 Jan 2020 12:39 p.m. PST |
(strangely professional army officers) Co-incidentally, three of our present six are ex-career officers (two British & one Australian army). They are outstanding people and formidable wargamers (all that real life training, I guess). À chacun son goût. |
| Syrinx0 | 03 Jan 2020 7:15 p.m. PST |
Our group has been around 40 or so years and has quite a few members over the years. Of those that left some split off to form their own groups, a few found another gaming group, a few have passed away, a few have stopped gaming but most just moved out of the area. We have banned 5 people for various uncivilized acts. One was told not to come back unless he bathed (with soap) and wore clean clothes – that was a weird conversation to have. |
| korsun0 | 03 Jan 2020 9:12 p.m. PST |
@ ochoin – 2 of ours were officers who were great blokes and very astute but were eventually transferred and were missed when they left; 2 were officers who must have slept through the entire ADFA tactical curriculum…… |
 Legion 4  | 04 Jan 2020 3:59 p.m. PST |
They are outstanding people and formidable wargamers (all that real life training, I guess). I've found that to be true also … Of course I'm biased … 2 were officers who must have slept through the entire ADFA tactical curriculum…… That happens too.  But generally Combat Arms, i.e. Inf and Tank Officers are pretty tactically savvy … Again … Of course I'm biased … |
| ochoin | 06 Jan 2020 3:53 a.m. PST |
Again … Of course I'm biased Agreed….but there are clearly exceptions to the rule. |
| Legion 4 | 06 Jan 2020 7:25 a.m. PST |
Obviously … that is why I said generally. However I know many of my comrades [& I!] were rated as demonstrating a [very] high level of tactical & technical expertise. It was considered by many, we knew our "business" … Especially as we gained experience … Which isn't to say we too didn't made tactical mistakes at times but those were few … but yet it happened.  |
| ochoin | 06 Jan 2020 1:21 p.m. PST |
Rated by whom? Considered by "many"? Obviously not in this case but mutual back slapping without any real and enforced standards is the downfall of many a hierarchy. There was a chap at B.I.G.(Brisbane Independent gamers)some years ago, I recall who was always referred to as the "Major". He was a bore of the first water & liked to tell stories of his exploits. It turned out he'd been in Alley Sloppers Cavalry but by his account those ChiComs in the Emergency didn't stand a chance against Sandhurst chaps….like himself. He was not the only reason I did not pursue an association with this wargames' club. There were several "Weekend Warriors" in the roster. |
| Legion 4 | 06 Jan 2020 4:42 p.m. PST |
Rated by whom? Considered by "many"? 1) Our Officer's Efficiency Reports … 2) Observations by superiors, comrades and subordinates … 3) Awards/Metals … I served in 4 Infantry Bns, in the Regular Army, worldwide … Combat unit's personnel are generally very competitive. If you didn't "make the mark", etc., you heard about. Obviously not in this case but mutual back slapping without any real and enforced standards is the downfall of many a hierarchy. Are you saying we were not good at our jobs ? We were not good at soldiering ? Or are you saying I am lying ? |
| ochoin | 06 Jan 2020 7:09 p.m. PST |
Are you saying we were not good at our jobs ? We were not good at soldiering ? Or are you saying I am lying ? You must have missed the first 5 words in the second paragraph in my post above…..though you quoted them?!? Obviously-not-in-this-case- Apology accepted. |
| etotheipi | 06 Jan 2020 7:59 p.m. PST |
Every combat veteran here has been given the greatest honor a warfighter could ever receive – their next breath. Cherish it and a round on me   |
| Legion 4 | 07 Jan 2020 8:26 a.m. PST |
You must have missed the first 5 words in the second paragraph in my post above…..though you quoted them?!?
Obviously-not-in-this-case-
Apology accepted. Don't understand ? What am I apologizing for ? Obviously not in this case but mutual back slapping without any real and enforced standards is the downfall of many a hierarchy. Again are you saying this is the case among those I served with ? I assure you this was not the case. Standards were very high in most cases. And if you did not make them you heard about it. That happened to me a few times. Maybe I misunderstood that you were referring directly to my comrades & I ? 
etotheipi +1
|
| ochoin | 07 Jan 2020 1:11 p.m. PST |
I'm writing in very plain, straight forward English. The meaning is clear. The single word "not" must make my meaning apparent. Are you looking for a fight? If so, I'm not interested in an infra.dig. internet name calling. If not, an apology would be the gentlemanly response to your incorrect accusations. Your ball. |
| Legion 4 | 07 Jan 2020 2:49 p.m. PST |
I leave the court … as I am not going to start this type of interaction again. As we have had in the past. I should take my own advise and not engage you in any thread. This discussion no longer serves any purpose as far as I can see … |
| ochoin | 07 Jan 2020 2:56 p.m. PST |
So, no apology? You were quick to take offence where obviously none was intended but slow to respond to make amends. I'm very disappointed in you Ralph. This does not speak well of you. |
| Legion 4 | 07 Jan 2020 3:28 p.m. PST |
You are correct … I misunderstood your post. Mea Culpa ! I am far from perfect, I'll freely admit. And that is well known to others … I made another poor decision … |
| Walking Sailor | 07 Jan 2020 3:38 p.m. PST |
in the Regular Army, worldwide … Combat unit's personnel are generally very competitive. If you didn't "make the mark", etc., you heard about. in the United States Army (others?), when an officer transfers in to an outfit, he is assigned to a position on staff. Only after proving himself there, is he given "troops" (i.e. a command). As command is a prerequisite to being considered for promotion (i.e "(P)"), the system's attrition (up or out) insures that no one rises past a position of incompetence. |
| ochoin | 07 Jan 2020 4:05 p.m. PST |
Ralph, no harm done. I appreciate your apology & acknowledge it takes a big man to climb down. Well done, you. |
| Jeffers | 08 Jan 2020 6:27 a.m. PST |
I've fired myself from groups. Sometimes you need to recognise when you don't fit in. |
| Legion 4 | 08 Jan 2020 6:57 a.m. PST |
in the United States Army (others?), when an officer transfers in to an outfit, he is assigned to a position on staff. Only after proving himself there, is he given "troops" (i.e. a command). As command is a prerequisite to being considered for promotion (i.e "(P)"), the system's attrition (up or out) insures that no one rises past a position of incompetence. Yes when I said worldwide I meant in the US Army. I know after my 10+ years on Active Duty, '79-'90, like almost all Infantry, Tank, FA, ADA,, even CEs and MPs officers. A brand new 2LT leads a Plt. E.g. for those that were not in the Military : In my case lead a 101 Air Assault Rifle Plt. Also lead the Co. 81mm Plt at times. Promotion from 2LT to 1LT was almost a given. But not always. Then became the Bn Air Ops Ofc as a 1LT. Sent to the Inf Adv Ofc Adv Course at Ft. Benning, GA. Promoted to CPT. Then to the ROK as an M113 Mech Bn Log Ofr – Bn S4, for 22 months. With a forward deployed Mech Bde. The Cdr wanted me to take command of a Mech Co. But I wanted to go back to the 101 or even the 82d. Was sent to Army Combined School at Ft. Levenworth, KS. Returned to Ft. Benning, GA, was assigned as a Mech Bn Maint. Ofr [BMO]. After about 6-8 months, the Bde Cdr took me to be the Bde MO. He liked my "work". About 18 months later, was chose to command a Mech Inf Co., in the same Bn I was the Bn MO. 18 Months later the new Bde Cdr who was my Bn Cdr in the ROK. Had me assigned as the Bde Asst. S4. He was liked my "work" in the ROK as a Bn S4 so he wanted me to do the same for him when he commanded a Mech Hvy Bde. So as can be seen as opposed to what you may see in the movies or wargame board, etc. An Officer spends most of his time on Staff. I hope this enlightens gamers to how things work in e.g. the US ARMY. Ralph, no harm done. I appreciate your apology & acknowledge it takes a big man to climb down. Well done, you. I try …  |
