"How would update Lord of the Rings to PULP?" Topic

Just had a weird thought about Frodo as a hard boiled detective but did not go very far with it.
He should get beat up a lot.

Great idea!

Maybe written by Raymond Chandler? It would be fun to have different writers take their own stab at it.

What would the true evil be? Nazis? Commies?

I think I'd keep the riders of Rohan and make them a motorcycle club.

I look forward to the ideas this thread generates--thanks for suggesting it!

'Ah, yes. But I'm too old for that sort of thing now,' said the old boggie, feigning a state of total quadriplegia. 'Anyway, I have a few small gifts for you,' and he produced a lumpy parcel, which Frito opened somewhat unenthusiastically in view of Dildo's previous going-away present [the ring]. But the package only contained a short, Revereware sword, a bulletproof vest full of moth holes, and several well-thumbed novellas with titles like Elf Lust and Goblin Girl…"
excerpt-Bored of the Rings

Glenn Cook of course has already combined the genres in his Garrett PI series.

Aragorn is of course already a pretty seedy character.

Frodo as a hard boilded detective / martial arts expert similar to Bruce Lee's "Kato" or Peter Lorre's "Mr. Moto." Uses his superior training and agility to outmaneuver and defeat brawnier opponents.

The evil guys could be organized crime and the majority of the government that they've bought off. That sets up your Moria orks (local police) vs uruk hai (the Capone family*)
Elves would be the local church, providing aid support.

* apologies to any current members of the Capone family if this offends, was just the first mafia like name to come to mind.

I see Sam as a short order cook.

Getting beat up a lot is pretty much the hallmark of the Pulp Detective.

When I saw LotR to Pulp, I thought of a change in writing style, from Tolkien to Howard or Burroughs. Not so much a whole genre change, but from epic fantasy to gritty fantasy. Aragorn comes off as a bit like Conan to begin with, we can rwvise the rest from there.

Wouldn't it be easier to "pulpify" LotR by shifting the focus to Aragorn?

It was Saturday night. I was down at the Prancing Pony drowning my sorrows. Turns out my pony hadn't pranced so good in that last heat, and I was down to beer money. I was drinking faster than I could pay, so I was going to need a client pretty soon. Suddenly, in barged a bunch of hobbits. They called for a room, and ordered up enough grub to feed a few trolls, all the while chattering like schoolgirls. One of was looking around all secretive-like, and presently mumbled something to the barkeep. Old Butterbur brought him to my table, and introduced us. "Call me Strider," I said. "Butterbur tells me your name is Underhill". I looked him over, which didn't take long as he was maybe three foot on tiptoe. "Ye-es," he stammered. He looked like a shopkeeper or a schoolmaster, not somebody who would be blowing into a strange town after dark; he also looked like a man in over his head. "Well, Mr Underhill," I said, "You should really tell your pals to pipe down. The walls have ears here -- and, I've been seeing a lot of shady characters in Bree lately". I had a feeling that I was about to open a new case. I'd rather have a willowy elf dame with legs up to here, but a client's a client.

Ron