"You walk into a room..." Topic

The host hands you a double sided, printed page, there are figures on the table, scattered terrain, what do you do? …

Blame the dice.

A flask, and slivers of deep fried salted vegetables are placed on the table for refreshments…it's a multiplayer game, other friends start to arrive….

It is dark here. You could be eaten by a grue.

It's a skirmish level game, Gates of Troy -defend the Balck ships, a slight variation.
6 players. Trojans have 3 forces of about 30 figures, 10 chariots, 11 skirmishers, several heroes including Aneas, hector and Paris.
The Greeks have about 60 figures, 7 chariots, 6 skirmishers, but more heroes….the fates have the Greeks moving first….

Check inventory

Pickpocket the host

INVENTORY: You have a bit of lint in your dressing gown pocket and a flask of an unknown substance.

PICKPOCKET The HOST: The host snarls at you and pushes you away. "Not this time," he growls.

XYZZY

Go over to the snacks, open a beverage and start reading.

+1 to your dice rolls James.
Chariots may not enter terrain. Skirmishers move full through terrain. Bows are supposed to move 1/2 if shooting, but in the rush of the game, players conveniently forget that…

Crush all that stand before my mighty armies!

Roll for SAN loss?

Looks like I'm the General again!

>go east

YOU ARE IN A MAZE OF TWISTY PASSAGES, ALL ALIKE.

Text based wargame. ;)
By east, you mean the left hand side of the table. Venturing too far forward, Cuff, Paris is a target for the 6 greek skirmishers, 5+ to hit, 5 hits. 3+ to save! Paris takes 3 wounds, he has one left.
Roosta, commanding the Greeks, cautiously moves forward.
Go, commanding the Trojan centre, charges forward, with paris and the skirmishers on the left flank.
I'm sorry OG, SAN does not compute GOTO Line 23.The right flank catches the Greek's malaise and cautiously move forward….

Eto, you're thinking about the "Theseus and the Minotaur" game that may be next week, if I get the figures painted up. ;) …

Since I cannot read the written material (not in native language) I proceed on best assumption which is wrong using the miniatures and terrain to the worst of my abilities, which is equal to the "poor rated" general and represented generalship which leads back to inability to understand the written page… double sided but I don't know… since I didn't read the last line on first page to refer to second or back side.

Dice wasn't mentioned…. Do I need to bring my own…. which I forgot of course.

Or…. hand material to nearby standing ADC flunky… telling him to "earn his promotion".

At least u made an attempt to read the written material, game masters don't go to the trouble of writing out them for no reason.
Your flunky explains that besides the points for eliminating the enemy, the Trojans gets points for having troops within 12" of the Greeks side of the table.
Although the chariots have a 16" move, the Trojans have screened their chariots with their skirmishers, who move at 6".
D6 required…guest dice provided, although they are notoriously bad…

Realize the printed sheet is in Barkerese and is only one sentence.

I walk out again. If the host can't be arsed to say hello then I can't be arsed to stay. If it is a nice table I will take pics first…

Wait a minute, someone's invited me into a game?

Throw axe at dwarf