Help support TMP


29 Posts

All members in good standing are free to post here. Opinions expressed here are solely those of the posters, and have not been cleared with nor are they endorsed by The Miniatures Page.

For more information, see the TMP FAQ.

Back to the Wargaming Spouses Message Board

1,615 hits since 15 Jun 2014
©1994-2018 Bill Armintrout
Comments or corrections?

Ottoathome Inactive Member15 Jun 2014 5:26 a.m. PST

Dear List

I have a question. Why is it if you were to get your wife a broom or a vacuum, she would look at you like something that crawled out from under a rock, but they expect you to gush and go all oogly when they get you a tool you never ask for.

Yet you have been dropping broad hints about what new minis or books you would like, including leaving a filled out order form from the company on her desk or dresser. But you'll never get them of course.

Why, when this is found, she says "Ugh! I want to get you something you REALLY want!"

This by the way is a rhetorical questions.

Why do you get the screwdriver that was in the "Free Bin" at the Walmart just two days ago.

Ottoathome Inactive Member15 Jun 2014 5:28 a.m. PST

Oh yes.. heard this survey on television the other day.

Only 3% of men want tools for their birthday, Christmas, or Fathers day.

Texas Jack15 Jun 2014 5:32 a.m. PST

Thatīs why I always take care of those things myself. I order my own wargaming gifts for Christmas, birthdays, and, especially appropriate for today, Fatherīs Day. I am never disappointed evil grin

Rudi the german Inactive Member15 Jun 2014 5:38 a.m. PST


I think you have to talk to her.
I got a lot of great gifts over the years, like gift vouchers, army transport boxes, city trips to my favorite tin sldier stores/ manufactures, paints and spays etc…

You do have to understand that they do not want/ can / care about the details of the hobby as we do so you have to give her the opportunity to support you on a very very strategic level….

You also have to coach them that the extemly expensive Loctite adhesive is also great for fixing shoes and earbells and small braclets! Since then I get from every of her visits to the hypermarket serval of them.

Just my opinion. I know examples of mariages were the wife was recruited to be a player and painter with very terible results even damaging the mariage.

Communication is key


olicana15 Jun 2014 5:45 a.m. PST

Women can't stand their men being idle.

Not doing something to improve the cave is idleness.

Ergo: Tools for Father's Day.

Actually my wife bought me a HUGE box of wine gums; but, she's clever; she figures when I've lost all of my teeth I'll be too embarrassed to go out and will spend more time in the cave doing cave improvements.

Cadian 7th Inactive Member15 Jun 2014 5:52 a.m. PST

I'm lucky, as I do get tools which I need/want, books, minis, rulesets, movies, and coffee/liquor supplies. My kids do look out for me. Of course, I also still own the infamous fish necktie( a pretty trout) and I told my daughters that I will wear it at their weddings! ;)

DS6151 Inactive Member15 Jun 2014 5:54 a.m. PST

I love tools. Men love tools. I have tools of all sorts, some I don't even know what they are used for!
Women do not love cleaning.

A gift is a gift, it shows someone thought of you.
That's all that matters, not the material object.

daubere Inactive Member15 Jun 2014 6:04 a.m. PST

I got a guitar. An expensive guitar that I mentioned in passing several months ago. Even though I have too many guitars already.

My wife loves me…

Captain Gamma Inactive Member15 Jun 2014 6:17 a.m. PST

I got a Mexican Wrestler mask (The Blue Demon)from my Step Daughter so I can wear it while I watch my Santo DVDs.

Mexican wrestler masks are cool. Step-daughters are cool.

Caesar Inactive Member15 Jun 2014 6:34 a.m. PST

My wife usually checks out my Amazon wishlists for ideas, or takes me to the flgs.

jdpintex15 Jun 2014 7:22 a.m. PST

My wife is sending me to Historicon with cash to spend.

I'm gonna keep her.

Texas Jack15 Jun 2014 7:23 a.m. PST

@daubere- you can never have too many guitars!

Great War Ace Inactive Member15 Jun 2014 7:24 a.m. PST

I have no wish lists. And over the years I have dissed Faddas' Day and Muddas' Day as merchant "holidays", along with Valentines and St Patty's etc. and etc. and etc. I do not wish to participate in any of them. I buy my own toys and expect everyone else to do the same. Wishing each other a happy day should be business as usual, not some exception to daily life….

Grelber15 Jun 2014 7:27 a.m. PST

My wife does not like to buy me figures, and does not entirely approve of my militant inclinations. So, I try to get her to buy me some of the supporting items, things that I probably wouldn't buy because I want to spend y cash on figures. Things like a new light for my painting table or an optivisor.

Not a perfect solution, but it seems to work out.


Inner Sanctum Inactive Member15 Jun 2014 7:47 a.m. PST

Wearing a vest to a wargames show, yoou fill it full of lead – but in one pocket you have something shiny. When you arrive home the vest is removed and slung nonchalantly over one shoulder, to be deposited somewhere safe. The shiny objest is brought out and wiggled.

Pyramid shaped trifles can be purchased if you need the container.

Everyone's happy.

I guess I'm lucky as our flat is sort of bursting and last year I was even wargaming in her shop on her "off" day.

Having a wife who understands you is both a blessing and a curse.

Who asked this joker15 Jun 2014 7:51 a.m. PST

Tools are good! I bought myself a Saws-all the other day to do some much needed destruction of bits around the yard. I might even give it a work-out today.

For days like today, it is better to do food. Good breakfast and maybe a trip to the coffee shop for me. I cook my wife some favorites on Mother's day. The past one we went to my sister's house so that was taken care of. I gave her a gift certificate to go to a fancy spa.

Personal logo Toy Soldier Green Supporting Member of TMP15 Jun 2014 8:12 a.m. PST

My birthday came the month after we were married. That was the only time I have been gifted wargame items. Been 6 years now and if I get anything it's generally things I don't want or need.

nnascati Supporting Member of TMP15 Jun 2014 9:37 a.m. PST

Last year I made the mistake of saying jokingly that now that I am retired, I should have a hammock. Well, come Fathers Day….. you know the rest! The only ones to use it so far are my wife, son in law and grand daughter. I'm just not a hammock sort of guy.

Charlie 12 Inactive Member15 Jun 2014 10:56 a.m. PST

Captain Gamma- A lucha libre mask??? How oool is that! Yeah, your step-daughter is definitely cool!

Which leads me to….

For the 'other' gift giving holidays (other than Xmas and birthdays) my family has always maintained that goofy, silly gifts that make everyone smile are the rule. Its a lot easier and a lot more fun…

Streitax Inactive Member15 Jun 2014 11:14 a.m. PST

If I wanted wargaming stuff my wife and kids would get it, but this year I told them not to get me anything. I'm in the middle of an inventory and have already found three times the amount of stuff I thought I had.

Texas Jack15 Jun 2014 11:19 a.m. PST

Ah, digging through the old lead pile, eh Streitax? Itīs like taking a geological sample- you can see level by level each era you were infatuated with.

Who asked this joker15 Jun 2014 12:29 p.m. PST

Itīs like taking a geological sample- you can see level by level each era you were infatuated with.

Ain't that right? Every once in a while I actually find something in my inventory that I don't remember buying!

Grelber15 Jun 2014 1:10 p.m. PST

And, having said what I said earlier, I just opened my presents to find a siege tower for my Vikings!


VonTed15 Jun 2014 1:41 p.m. PST

I told my wife she (I) was getting a kickstarter pledge for father's day….. worked a okay for me :)

coryfromMissoula15 Jun 2014 3:13 p.m. PST

My 15 year old son gave me a bookcase he made using the woodshop in school. He hasn't even taken shop, just been going in on his lunch hour over the last 3 months.

He also spent half of yesterday repairing a box of FOW stuff that had fallen off a high shelf.

Bandolier15 Jun 2014 6:05 p.m. PST

I'm a bit like Great War Ace.
I ask not to receive gifts on Father's/Birth/Christmas days as it's all just another day alive. Happy to get a card, a nice breakfast or dinner and good wishes but no need to get 'stuff' for the sake of getting 'stuff'. My missus and I give each gifts whenever we see things the other may like or need.

Personal logo COL Scott ret Supporting Member of TMP16 Jun 2014 7:44 p.m. PST

I got some restaurant gift cards to take her out to dinner with. Which I would do any way. but nice none the less.

She has already said that she doesn't know what to get me for wargaming wishes. Probably time is the number one thing but there are still only 24 hours in the day and seven days in a week.

Jemima Fawr Inactive Member27 Jun 2014 11:10 a.m. PST

I make things easy for the Memsahib by buying books and models for her to give to me…

When the Memsahib wants the 'cave' changing for the umpteenth pointless reason ("The roof is still on, isn't it darling?"), I pay a 'rude mechanical' to do it.

trailape29 Jun 2014 6:40 a.m. PST

Never had that problem.
My wife ALWAYS buys me wargame miniatures and Military History books.
I'm truly blessed.

Sorry - only verified members can post on the forums.