"Star Trek: Into Blechness... WITH HUGE SPOILERS" Topic

As I've said here before, I can't stand the Abrams version of Star Trek. If you like it, that's fine by me. Different strokes, etc. But if you like the first one and plan to see the second, THIS THREAD IS NOT FOR YOU.

Not because you can't comment or disagree— feel free— but because this thread will be about the "surprises" of the new movie that you won't want to know about until you see it.

I'm not kidding.

Hey, the last thing I want to do is deny anyone the pleasure of enjoying the surprises in a film they might want to see.

But I don't want to see this film, and didn't from the get go, and now have my utter disgust for Abrams and his inability to appreciate Trek for what Trek is— or to even honor its legacy— confirmed.

Here's the review with the horrible, pathetic details. WARNING— THIS REVIEW CONTAINS SPOILERS— VERY IMPORTANT ONES— SO DON'T READ UNLESS YOU WANT THE SURPRISE COMPLETELY STRIPPED FROM THE FILM. Not, frankly, that Abrams doesn't frickin' deserve it.

link

It's not my review. I didn't write it, I haven't seen it, and heck, I don't live in Sydney, Australia anyway.

But to me, this review confirms that Abrams has no appreciation for what Star Trek is or was, or, frankly, for great film making.

What a hack plot. And especially what a hack ending. Unoriginal, unimaginative, implausible, and utterly absurd— even by Star Trek standards.

PASS, PASS, PASS and FOREVER PASS.

Feel free to disagree. Not that you'll change my mind.

I'm gonna rewatch The Wrath of Khan and enjoy a good Star Trek movie made by people with imagination and vision.

Oh? You're going to watch something after you watch The Wrath of Khan?

The best line in the review is referring to the engine room as "…the Budweiser plant…".

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THANK YOU!

OK, I'm going to give my first impressions here and then a follow up after reading the review.

I hate the JJ Abrams' version of Star Trek as well. He directs and produces the movies as if it's a calling card for the Star Wars job…and it turns out that is exactly what he's been doing.

His first movie was a big sleight of hand job. Whilst watching it, the enthusiasm of the cast and the frenetic pace stops it from ever becoming boring and as a generic space action movie it's OK. As Star Trek, it's atrocious. It's the kind of movie a lot of people I know came out from saying "it was pretty good, great action, the cast was good…the villain was a bit lame though, and it was dumb in places, and Kirk acted more of a jerk than he usually does, and what they did with Vulcan was bad, and they screwed up the Kobyashi Maru test, and what was the deal with Red Matter? That was a dumb concept, HEY, THIS MOVIE IS PRETTY BAD AFTER ALL!

The trailers and posters for Into Darkness haven't inspired me either. Try spotting anything like Star Trek in them. Spies, terrorists, urban bleakness, flappy coats, industrial age futurism….to boldly go? I don't think so. Anyway, back after the review….

…that didn't take long.

That was about the dumbest and most contrived plot they could have come up with for the movie…."Spock's Brain" made more sense.

Tribbles? Seriously?

I am speechless.

That's at least stopped me wasting money on the DVD.

You have to remember that Abrams Star Trek is set in a different "universe" from the earlier movies. It's not the nice clean future of the original Federation of Planets. Having said that…thanks for the review, Kind of had my mind made up already, but this helps.

KNEW IT! I may boycott the movie completely now, not just refuse to spend any money on it at all…

Damon.

I was put off by the overuse of special effects in the first Abrams ST movie.

Oh Pleeeesseee! No doubt old Gene is just going to roll over a little more, might create some tremors in So. Cal,….. Hey! I think I can come up with a great plot for ST:3, … Anyone want to bank roll the development?

Gad, the fellows with the on-line trek episodes have a much better handle on what is going on.

The good news is that in about 10 years someone else can step to the plate and fix all of these issues with a "new" trek. Well, they've done it with Superman, and Batman.

News Just IN! Jeremy Conrad (who a simple google search will reveal HATES JJ Abrams with a passion) disses new ST movie directed by Abrams…

Film at may 17 (or so)

Wow. That saved some the ever-dwindling indiscretionary spending budget for more important things – like Vikings. Thanks!

Abrams' Enterprise engine room was a Budweiser bottling plant with some extra bits and a few stickers. I expected to see Laverne & Shirley working there.

Al | ravenfeastsmeadhall.blogspot.com

I hate to see how JJ Assbrams is gunna screw up the Star Wars franchise…

Though undead tribbles? I'd like to see that!

Star wars was already screwed by the time Abrahms got given the gig, so i'm not so worried about what he does there. Trek deserves better.

The best way to handle JJ Trek is to just ignore it… It's irrelevant and pointless.

Paramount is just trying to squeeze every drop of money it can out of Star Trek, by any means necessary.

Thanks. It was a four out of ten for me before, now I'll have to adjust my ten point scale for negative ratings. Sounds worse than Warriors of Virtue.

So I hear Maurice is on sale…

And here I thought the first Abrams film was as bad as any film could be…..

all I got was fecking commericals, surveys and pop-ups which I did NOT 'appreciate' through that link.

As far as the 'plot', even IF BC is 'Khan' this is a totally DIFFERENT 'universe' and things are 'different.'
I have been a 'trekker' most of my life…(having even seen the ORIGINAL series back when it FIRST was broadcast…)…and each of it's 'incarnations'/series/movies/cartoons…since then.
Some were 'better' than others….some weren't….but I still enjoyed the 'ride' along the way. Same for the Star Wars and other 'franchises'…well, perhaps with the exception of the 'Lord of the Rings', 'Game of Thrones', 'Twilight', 'Harry Potter', etc…

I sorta got 'burned out' on the Fantasy genre…but to each their own. I won't put termites on your 'ents' if you won't feed pop-rocks to my tribbles….ok?

Live and let live, I say…..but then, I've sorta 'mellowed' in my second millenium as my Unka' thulu would say….

You guys are funny. :)

I wasnt going to watch it anyway, since Cumberbatches face makes me want to vomit. Seriously, his head looks like it was made by the woman in Lionel Richie's "Hello"
This just makes me want to see it even less.

It IS in a different timestream, so at least you can sleep easy knowing the original one is unsullied.
But a mish-mash of elements from a highly regarded [I think] original is less impressive than something new.

The idea that this all occurs in a seperae timeline, and that the original is still preserved is all great, but does anyone seriously think the franchise will return to the "original" timeline, ever? So while the original timeline is "unsullied" it is also as good as dead.

Damon.

> does anyone seriously think the franchise will return to the "original" timeline, ever?

Most novels are still set there. Other then that, the last movie put the nail in the coffin.

Judge not the cloth ‘til the thread is done

Judge not the cloth ‘til the thread is done

Been googling me, eh, Coabeous?

Nicely done!

But I think the thread is done on the Abrams's film, so I can freely judge it.

Yes this is so lame. But. . .I will go see it anyway. It not a bad movie, just not REAL ST. Just like the Mission Impossible movies will never be Mission Impossible.

Just enjoy it for what it is.. Imagine how bad it would be if it would have been produced by the SyFy Channel.

They need to get Bruce Campbell a spot in this new ST movie line up. Then at least we would have some great lines to laugh at.

JJ-Trek isn't for the long term Star Trek viewer; it's for a new generation of fans who have only a vague connection to the original series.

Two "positive" reviews summed it up pretty well for me: "Star Trek Into Darkness hasn't got a clever script but with the visuals and energy it has, that doesn't matter" (oh yes it does). The other one went "Die hard fans will probably hate this movie but with a strong new fanbase, the old guard don't matter anymore".

JJ Abrams will probably do OK with Star Wars because that's what he's always wanted to direct and produce.

the old guard don't matter anymore"

This is really a key issue for me, and one not limited to Trek alone. Being a fan requires an investment: in time, money advocacy, etc. But the trend these days seems to be that the fans are "expendible."

Damon.

I'm finding it odd that I haven't yet seen any other independent reports confirming these 'spoilers'. The only other articles I've seen about this refer to the original source material above.

Well if everyone boycotts the movie, then 1 of 2 things happen 1 the studios decide to reboot it again, maybe with Uwe Boll or 2 Star Trek has had its day and no trek films, good or bad are made for years. Was the Abrams film really as bad as Star Trek the motion picture? or the Shatner helmed film or Nemesis? really? By doing an alternate timeline the past is protected and I bet the Alien franchise wish they could do that and start over;)

Sounds like fun, actually.

Needs more explosions, boobs, and dahrk gothik brooding, oh and lots of spikey hair…. yeah, that would be EPIC, LOL.

…Why do all these movies seem to blend together? (StarWars, StarTrekJJstyle, LOTR 'the reckoning', etc…)… they are made by the same people for the same audience… and the money keeps rolling in…

Regardless of anyone's opinion on which vision of a particular 'franchise' (?) is better or worse, and why, just slapping a title on something does not make it that thing (If I called blue my reimagining or 'reboot' of red, you would rightly classify me as an imbecile, despite my cries of "…but it's ahhhhhhrt!")

Of course, why create your own world when you can 'reinvent' someone else's by slapping their title and trappings on your own big steaming pile of 'ahrt' and make millions of dollars…

And there you have it.

It's a tricky thing to classify the first JJ-Trek movie as either good or bad because it is both. I will admit it does some things a lot better than The Motion Picture, Nemesis, Insurrection or The Final Frontier. With the exception of Nemesis, however, those were properly Star Trek movies.

In fact, Nemesis and JJ-Trek have a lot in common: They both mess up the Romulans as a classic Star Trek villain for one thing. Shinzon and Nero are practically the same person for another. Picard and Kirk seem to waste time fannying around in petrol driven vehicles. Spock and Data largely abandon supressed emotions and logic that have hiterto characterised them. Oh, and there's a romantic subplot that has no bearing on the outcome of the movie and some mistimed comedy as well. They look like Star Trek movies in terms of costumes, spaceships and the characters have the same names but in both cases I was acutely aware of how much both movies were not like classic Star Trek at all.

But I can't argue with JJ-Trek's box office returns. Something is striking a chord with audiences but I hold Star Trek to the standard of the best moments of the original TV series and that's why I can't warm to JJ Abrams' movies. If the series failed in individual episodes, then I was content in the knowledge that there was always next week's. And TV is where Star Trek rightly belongs.

Well I'm a fan, just saw the film, liked it and am so glad you wowsers are going to miss it.

It's somewhere between a three and four out of five kind of film. Some nice set-pieces, good cast but a script that particularly in the last third starts to feel like a Star Trek greatest hits compilation.

I said a week or two back about the film Oblivion that it felt like something written by committee to cater to as many demographics as possible and the end result was something that was watchable but forgettable; and I sort of get the impression that was what they were aiming for.

When you're taking about a clash between business and creativity it's pretty obvious which one is going come out the loser. Creativity has to risk failure but business wants reliable returns. I think the reality is once a setting becomes a reliable cash-cow its best days are behind it because it becomes to financially valuable to risk. Star Trek will soldier on with more vaguely watchable, largely forgettable films and shows.

Although as you say the Star Trek film was a bit been there and done that but aren't most movies like that these days?
I am a fan of the original Trek series but found the movies made with the original cast very dull, the nostalgia factor lasted about 30 miniutes for me and the plots were near non existant. Atleast with this new release the actors can act beyond just reading their lines out.
As for Oblivion, just another Tom Cruise its all about me film. It could have been a far better film with a different male lead.

Just watched it – loved it.

Big fan of TOS-DS9 (Most of Voyager & Enterprise was pants other than the last season) and I for one think JJ has saved Trek.

Bring on the next one.

Just enjoy it for what it is.. Imagine how bad it would be if it would have been produced by the SyFy Channel.

I dunno, I think SyFy might be an improvement…

I was ok with the fist jj trek, shallow yes, but passable. I found this one horrible! Scrambled references to beloved Trek lore stripped of heart and paraded about like a ho. I found myself bored during large chunks as well. Save your $. USD

I liked it and I watched the original Star Trek when it was new. He did rip off Godfather III with the helicopter killing all those officers sitting in a circle…..they did finally put seat belts on the Enterprise. And why not Khan, it's not as bad as the seventeenth recycling of Superman.

I loved it and thoroughly enjoy the new vision of Star Trek. I am a fan of TOS series and movies. I watched DS9 and hated all the other series. I think this new crew does a better job of impersonating the originals than the original crew created themselves. The mannerisms the accents, the jokes. I like the amalgamation of the series and movie ships, and uniforms (although, I will always and forever like the red Starfleet movie uniforms the best). I Star Trek has done enough with the heady issues, I like the constant action and battling. I hope they keep going and I hope this new movies universe is fully supported by fans.

I did get a nice pair of 3D glasses ;)