"Why are you worried about stifles?" Topic

How are you harmed if you are stifled?

This is NOT the place to rant about how childish they are. or how Real Men do not stifle.
Start another thread about that if you must.
If you DO start to rant about that, I will just have to assume you are illiterate, or cannot follow directions.
Neither is this the thread to justify them.

I am truly curious why some people seem obsessed with the concept of stifling, with their own stifle count, and why they think they can pin down when and where they picked them up.
I am also curious why some think they are harmed by being stifled.

I consider them harmles and silly.

I consider them harmles and silly.

Certainly not as important as 'Speling', sir.

They're childish, and Real Men don't use them.

What?

What?

I've wondered the same thing- I can't understand why anyone cares one way or the other about someone else stifling them. It has absolutely no bearing whatsoever on your ability to use and enjoy TMP to the fullest extent possible.

The only person a stifle deprives of anything is the stifler, ultimately, since it leaves one less pool of potenrial knowledge and inspiration in their sphere.

- Monk

The correct spelling, von Deutsch, is schteiffel, and I care not about them, so you are being rather presumptuous……

I've got a few stifles, but I think I got them from a toilet seat.

Taken out of context 'xx is trying to stifle me!' sounds like a rather uncouth thing to do.

I don't care, even if I find it mildly interesting to see when my count increases.

The only person a stifle deprives of anything is the stifler, ultimately, since it leaves one less pool of potenrial knowledge and inspiration in their sphere.

Not the dudes that I have stifled.
They are incapable of rational thought, except in the sense of the "stopped clock is right twice a day" sense.

Not the dudes that I have stifled.
They are incapable of rational thought, except in the sense of the "stopped clock is right twice a day" sense.

Perhaps there is upset because some people don't like the thought that someone has come to that kind of conclusion about them on the basis of something they have written on TMP?

Regard

I was afraid that if future employers viewed my TMP profile they would see my stifles and think that I wasn't a team player and couldn't fit into their strategic operationalisms. I went to a seminar about social media last week and they said they can't do that. Or if they do I can sue them.

So now I'm not as worried anymore. The only other concern would be if my mom saw how many stifles I had but she doesn't really know how to work the interwebs anyway.

The ones that I would like to stifle aren't on TMP.

Did you post something John?

I didn't even know it I had any stifles until I read this and checked? I guess I don't care?
Now that I wonder, why do people stifle others -- a simple disagreement or a serious offensive foul?
Regards
Russ Dunaway

The easiest solution would be to make it all public, when you click on a membership name it would show whom the member has stifled, and who has stifled him. Fair, public, and would certainly show who the thin-skinned censors might be. My guess is that they would be a distinct minority, and there would be few surprises as to who they were, and why they stifle.

I guantee that 90% of all stifles are socio-political at root. I would also place a bet as to where on the political scale the majority would be found. The easiest way to eliminate the arbitrary nature of stifles is to shine the light of open disclosure on them.

And, of course, they are very silly…and meaningless.

Repiqueone, why?
You give a "solution" to a problem that does not exist.
You have not defined why or how anyone is harmed, so why do you need to fix it?

I don't care about being stifled, or how many I have. I am sometime curious about which topic the stifle originated from(not the person), since I have received a strife or two from "out of the blue" so to speak, and I would like to know what topic generated the strife.

…and I would like to know what topic generated the strife.

Again, why? How are you harmed?

Actually, John, I often wonder why you are so worried about what people think about stifles. If you don't care one way or another, then it shouldn't brother you if some complains, or some want them removed, or whatever.

You are the one that keeps bringing the subject up, even to the point that when someone suggest any type of change, you attack the notion with all your energy. Thus, if you don't care about them, then you should also not care if someone is upset or worried about them.

To me, I believe what upsets people about the whole stifle thing is that often appears to be of the same mind set as teenage girl rolling her eyes at a person and says, "whatever!".

Joel, I stifle and I am stifled. Those who have stifled me have done me no harm. Nor have I harmed in any way those who I have stifled. And, I am not "worried", merely puzzled.
This is how I manage MY TMP account, and I only wonder why people would want to deprive me of that, if it does not affect them in any way.

It is not anything that I would have introduced a few years ago when Dear Editor gave us the ability. It nevber occurred to me.
I am simply puzzled why the control freaks want to control it.

And I might add that NO ONE, save Pictors, has bothered to say how anyone who is stifled is harmed.

John,

No need to fix. No one is harmed, you are quite correct. However, it does seem to me that a more open method of implementation would be far closer to the US cultural practice of democratic responsibility and accountability, and less like some KGB, Gestapo, Stasi inspired anonymous, faceless, action. This applies to the complaint button as well. It would seem that if a person has strong feelings of censoring or reporting on others, he should own it-and be willing to be accountable.

If the stifle and the DH are publicly known events, why shouldn't the causative agent also be publicly known? Fair and balanced, no?

Dear Editor does not name who ratted on someone when they hit the Complaint button.
Why should the "victim" know who does not want to read what they wrote? That is ALL a stifle is!

No one compiles a list of those who turn off WILK Radio when Rush Limbaugh comes on the air, or turns off the TV when Barack Obama makes a speech, so why should TMP let anyone know who stifled them?
Again, how are they harmed? No one has yet answered that question.

If you're stifled too much the community is telling you that you deviate from convention and you should be handed over to the Stasi for not fitting in.

If you're beloved, accepted, and obey the hive, your stifle count will be low because you spew nothing but common sense, hilarious/interesting/useful/inspiring posts.

Or you don't post at all so no sensitive stifler even recognizes you enough to feel disturbed by your presence.

The harm is psychological; the threat is alienation from the group which leads to a decreased ability for you to fulfill your needs/wants/desires. If they can't see you, they can't help you.

if what you say is true, John, why should the number of stifles then be listed at all? If no one makes lists of people who turn off Limbaugh or Obama-why should TMP then post a list of stifles? If it is truly a matter for the individual doing it and no one else-then why a tabulated list? Especially one that I suspect may be arbitrarily inflated by delisting-re-listing by certain infantile individuals.

If your argument is correct-then the logical conclusion is that no stifle list should be kept. But a list is kept and posted, why? Does it serve to do anything but encourage infantile behavior? What is the purpose of the list if it is, as you say, a private matter?

I can only assume that someone, perhaps the editor, thinks it does serve a purpose. What might that be, if, as you say, it does no harm?

Again, why? How are you harmed?

Harmed man, I am flattered. The notion that I have upset someone sufficiently for him to stifle me is like caffeine coursing through my veins in the morning!

If no one makes lists of people who turn off Limbaugh or Obama

Are you sure of that?

I simply assume people who have stifled me are idiots who are depriving themselves of my boundless knowledge, keen wit and incisive intelligence.

Whether this is actually true is completely unimportant to me. I'm allowed to assume whatever I like, as long as no children or animals are harmed.

why should TMP then post a list of stifles?

Not my decision. Ask Dear Editor. However, if it is a statistic that reminds the stiflee that he just MIGHT be rubbing people the wrong way, what's the harm?

What is the purpose of the list if it is, as you say, a private matter?

Where did I say it was a private matter?

I don't care about the ones I have, and I certainly don't care enough to start a thread about it. Today must be a really slow TMP day because that seems to be the only time we gets topics started on stifles!

Grizzly, you can't turn it off, if it was never on. You are quite correct that firms specializing in demographics can tell a LOT about you just from your Zip Code-including how often you listen to various programs. Add in information about education, income, age, car make, what you drink, and whether you're married, divorced, and male or female and they can probably guess what movies you go to, who you vote for, and your pant size within a pretty good range. They don't need to "listen in."

People are not as unique as they think-which is why you frequently hear-"Well, all my friends say the same thing!"

"I am truly curious why some people seem obsessed with the concept of stifling, with their own stifle count, and why they think they can pin down when and where they picked them up."

I'd want to what what I did to offend someone so I could avoid make the same kind of error again.

John,

Caring about rubbing people the wrong way-depends greatly upon which people, does it not?

My remark about it being a private matter is based on your acceptance of the privacy of the stifler-and it being their private choice-deserving of no public exposure. Why that privacy should not extend to the stiflee is the issue. Unless someone believes it serves a purpose. Which would mean someone thinks it does have an effect, albeit whether it is harmful or not is the question.

John,

I agree with you about the strife functions, it is a harmless, silly tool that dose not upset or harm me in anyway.

I just said I was curious, about which topic caused someone to use it. For example, during a discussion about the cause of the Civil War, I stated that it was due to slavery and every other causes given at the time were just a red herring, intended to justify the case for war and put it in a more positive light. As you can imagine by the next day 2 people had strife me. OK, I can understand why the strife, the next day, some people uncomfortable with my opinion.

However, I have also received a strife or two, for no apparent reason that I can see and sometime wonder what I posted that got under someone skin? That why I said in my first post, "I would like to know what topic generated the strife", since I have no way of knowing which of my 10 or 15 active posts could be the source. As of way I want to know which post caused the strife, old fashion curiosity on my part, nothing more or less that all.

Stop listing them and the problem goes away.
All forums I know of have an 'ignore' function, but none of them list how many are ignoring you (by software or manually).

TMP is the only place this is even a discussion, except very rarely as a joke.

I was obsessed with how my count grew so fast. But now I am just obsessed with remaining "The King". Bring 'em on!

Stifles are a stoopid feature. That means I am "The King" of stoopid….

Every time I see someone compare Stifles to censorship, i have to ask myself a question about that person. One which I will now ask on the forum :

If you believe the two are related, is it because you do not understand how Stifles work/what they are or is it that you do not understand what the word Censorship means?

"No one compiles a list of those who turn off WILK Radio when Rush Limbaugh comes on the air, or turns off the TV when Barack Obama makes a speech, so why should TMP let anyone know who stifled them?"

Nor are you a socio-political misfit when you decline to answer the phone, knowing that whoever is calling has nothing to say that you wish to hear.

"If your argument is correct-then the logical conclusion is that no stifle list should be kept."

Agreed.

"Stop listing them and the problem goes away."

Agreed.

"I simply assume people who have stifled me are idiots who are depriving themselves of my boundless knowledge, keen wit and incisive intelligence."

So true. Yet conversely…

Somebody start a poll.

Allen

"How are you harmed?"

Here's an idea: If one were to post on TMP with a question about a certain subject (or even just raise an issue regarding a certain subject) from which feedback/response from other posters (sorry…poster's) would/could provide a benefit to said poster, the lack of response(benefit) from someone who'd stifled the questioner would, in a sense, cause harm by its (sorry again…it's) absence.

The concept could even be extended to a stifler who doesn't see (and therefore cannot comment on) a valuable/catalytic post by a different person in the discussion that could/would have provided the key and/or important(beneficial) piece of information for the thread in question.

Diminishment harms all.

How's that? ; )

PS- I, personally, value the thoughts/opinions of those who think I'm an idiot more than those who agree with me, and so find their posts/responses to be the most sought after.

Nor are you a socio-political misfit when you decline to answer the phone, knowing that whoever is calling has nothing to say that you wish to hear.

And I thought I was the only socio political misfit in the world!

[Grizzly, you can't turn it off, if it was never on. You are quite correct that firms specializing in demographics can tell a LOT about you just from your Zip Code-including how often you listen to various programs. Add in information about education, income, age, car make, what you drink, and whether you're married, divorced, and male or female and they can probably guess what movies you go to, who you vote for, and your pant size within a pretty good range. They don't need to "listen in."

People are not as unique as they think-which is why you frequently hear-"Well, all my friends say the same thing!"]

eh?

I'm not but….this isn't the first thread along these lines started by JohnTOFM – so maybe someone is more worried about them than others are.

Just saying.

But he ISN'T "worried about them". Not in the least. I can't imagine how anybody could read his posts on the matter and get that from them.

I wonder the same thing about those who go on and on about the First Amendment and censorship when it comes to stifling. The function has not one thing to do with either of those things.

And the reason people can't come up with an answer to the question, John, is that there isn't one!

Do people who stifle just want yes men? Because it seems to me you can't do anything here that would get you smacked upside the head in a bar by a drunk. So then I guess the next thing is that anyone being stifled is saying something so stupid or ridiculous someone doesn't want to be bothered by them. Even if my (or anyone else's) posts are only interesting or valid 5% (of 1%) that still a chance of missing something. Every once in a while I look at someone's profile to see where there from or what their interested in and look at their stifle count and can't believe how many they have when I think they shouldn't have any. That's my take and I suspect my stifle count will go up a few more and I don't care.

"…the reason people can't come up with an answer to the question, John, is that there isn't one!"

Hey, I resemble that remark…

I am not worried by stiffles. The day I got my first and only three was in a conversation I figured I would get stiffled. Two of those three have since unstiffled me.

I would like to believe that my contributions to TMP, although small, are well received and knowing that my auction posts are not stiffled makes me not care about the stifle option.

I admit it. I am bothered by stifles. I percieve myself as a pretty mild, unobnoxious guy. Stifles would seem to indicate that my perception of myself is not entirely correct. I dont like being wrong nor do I like being percieved as someone who needs to be stifled.

As to whether I am harmed I think so in the manner gweirda mentioned. I often seek information on something or other on this forum and perhaps the information I seek is not provided because I have been stifled by the person having that information. This is purely selfish on my part since I dont really care if someone who has stifled me misses my pearls of wisdom :).

Hey, stifle this, man!

I don't worry about stifles.

I don't care about stifles.

I have no idea how many stifles I have. Can't be bothered to look it up.

Laugh if you want, but here's my answer. Yes, getting stifled has bugged me in the past (a knee-jerk reaction) because of my own vanity. Over the years, here and there, I've taken a couple stands here and there where controversial issues were brought up on TMP. For better or worse, I said what was on my mind, got a little heat from a couple honest folks face-to-face, and got stifled by a handful of individuals secretly.

I'm not bothered any more (not that I was really upset to begin with.) For one thing, I can't make everyone happy all the time, nor do I want to. In all truthfulness, I'm not all that happy about anonymous stifling (and the count), but there isn't anything I can do about it.

There seem to be many decent, nice people here on TMP, and many things of interest. I've asked myself whether I want to concentrate on TMP's negative aspects (and my own handful of slightly unpleasant experiences) or the positive ones. I feel that TMP's good aspects far outweigh the bad ones, and that's why I've stuck around.

Ultimately, no: stifling doesn't worry me.

galvinm

6

Jeigheff

13 – unlucky for some

I am not so much worried about being stifled, people aren't always going to find my jokes funny or what I have to say relevant. Those are some real reasons to do it. So no I am not all that worried about them.

On the other hand, who wants to come across as a douche? Sometimes that is going to happen, and if that is the reason, then it does worry me.