"What if Germany had lost the war?" Topic

What if the allied invasion of Normandy had actually succeeded? And Rommel hadn't triumphed at El-Alamein?

Check it out:

link

Would we all be speaking English now?

It is a chilling hypothesis, though.

"What if Germany had lost the war?"

er … they did … didn't they?

Mike, it's called "satire". Go to the link.

I thought that "satire" was supposed to be funny.

I don't know if they lost or not. Lactrine Digging Tactics of the Third Reich is still one of Osprey's top sellers.

"Mike, it's called "satire". Go to the link."

I followed the link. "The Onion" claims to be "America's Finest News Source". I think I'll stick to the BBC, thanks.

If this is supposed to be satirical, how come you described it as a "chilling hypothesis"? Or were you saying that with a smile on your face?

Obviously the Allies would have turned on each other and the world would have been torn apart by 5 more years of war. With Russia eventually winning and the entire world becoming Communitst.

Meh. Mildly amusing. Mildly in poor taste.

For an alternative universe, the beginning scenes from the movie "Fatherland" is always interesting to watch. (documenting the failed Allied invasion of Normandy, the eventual surrender of England, and the creation of 'Germania'.)

If Mike can't figure out the Onion, there's no hope in trying to explain it to him. :)

"If Mike can't figure out the Onion, there's no hope in trying to explain it to him. :)"

I "figured out" the Onion alright. But if the Onion is humour/satire, then give me Monty Python any day. Now MP really is satire!

Mike

The Onion is a VERY well known purveyor of spoof news stories.

I assume the author had become a bit exasperated with the Fuhrer obsessed output of the HIstory Channel

I will grant you that the Onion is not memorized by geeks without a life who must entertain you by reciting pags and pages of script, usually with atrocious British accents.

"I will grant you that the Onion is not memorized by geeks without a life who must entertain you by reciting pags and pages of script, usually with atrocious British accents."

Meaning what, exactly?

Meaning exactly what I said. There are few people more irritating and boring than Monty Python Reenactors. To quote one or two lines is wit. To recite a meomrized scriopt for ten minutes without a break is … tedious.

"There are few people more irritating and boring than Monty Python Reenactors. To quote one or two lines is wit. To recite a memorized script for ten minutes without a break is … tedious."

Monty Python Reenactors? What on earth are they? I am referring to the original TV series and the films.

I like Monty Python. A little hit or miss but when they are on, they are very funny.

Onion is funny in a different way. Again, a little hit or miss.

Mike, do you mean that you do not know people who have memorized every single act that any Month Python ever did?
You have never been subjected to the "She's a witch!" act from Holy Grail?
You have never been corrected if you get a reference to the Spanish Inquisition one word wrong?
You do not live in fear of saying the word "shrubbery" around some losers and loners who infest your club?

I congratulate you.

The TMP Snorbens appreciation society has so far clocked up 640 Snorbo Points during this thread.

For every time Mike fails to notice what John Cleese calls "The bleedin' obvious" (Python reference!) it's 50 points.

For every time Mike answers a thread that starts, say, "Who makes 15mm WWI Latvians?" with "I don't do 15mm and I don't do Latvians", it's another 25 points per part.

For every time Mike argues with another TMPer it's 20 pts per posting.

For every time Mike quarrels with himself, it's 100 pts.

Points are randomly added for unusually bizarre comments or observations.

Players are expected to chug a glass of their chosen beverage every 300 points.

Last one able to type is the day's winner.

Any questions?

@John the OFM

"There are few people more irritating and boring than Monty Python Reenactors."

THANKYOU, THANKYOU, THANKYOU

"Mike, do you mean that you do not know people who have memorized every single act that any Month Python ever did?"

No. You mean there really are such???

"You have never been subjected to the "She's a witch!" act from Holy Grail?"

No.

"You have never been corrected if you get a reference to the Spanish Inquisition one word wrong?"

No. If anyone says "Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition!" or mentions the "dreaded Comfy Chair" then we all fall about laughing!!

"You do not live in fear of saying the word "shrubbery" around some losers and loners who infest your club?"

No. If anyone mentions a "shrubbery" we're also likely to start shouting "Ni! Ni! Ni!" and fall about laughing again!!!

"I congratulate you."

Yeah, these days we Brits delight in watching Monty Python shows and films on DVD.

"For every time Mike fails to notice what John Cleese calls "The bleedin' obvious" (Python reference!) it's 50 points."

Since I was not previously aware of the spoof news site The Onion, I fail to see how that was missing the "bleedin' obvious".

"For every time Mike answers a thread that starts, say, "Who makes 15mm WWI Latvians?" with "I don't do 15mm and I don't do Latvians", it's another 25 points per part."

The discussion was about a satirical (???) view of the result of WW2. I responded that if that was satire then I'd stick to Monty Python. How was that off topic?

"For every time Mike argues with another TMPer it's 20 pts per posting."

Only when they argue with me!!

"For every time Mike quarrels with himself, it's 100 pts."

Has been known, but not in this thread …

"Points are randomly added for unusually bizarre comments or observations."

Were there any of those?

"Players are expected to chug a glass of their chosen beverage every 300 points."

I'm game … pints all round then?

"Last one able to type is the day's winner."

OK, you're on!

MJS-- Don't forget the random "That depends by what you mean by…? questions he throws into most threads that he brings to a grinding halt.

I'd say those would be worth 30 points.

Heck, let's make this a drinking game like Newhart's "Hi Bob!" one. Of course then we'd all be drunk constantly…

"MJS-- Don't forget the random "That depends by what you mean by…? questions he throws into most threads that he brings to a grinding halt."

If people were more accurate with their postings this would not be necessary. I cannot be held responsible for others lack of precision or inability to discuss vague issues.

Threads where I have asked such questions usually take off into heated debate rather than come to a grinding halt!
TMP link

If I ever make it to the UK, I will happily visit Mike to recite hours of memorized Monthy Python sketches and movie scenes. :>
I usually only say them to myself because I am socially aware enough that a few well-placed snippets are valuable but Monty Python should not be quoted at any length.

For a very clever The Onion article, please see:
link
Caution- contains much foul language.

I personaly preffered their "Twelve year old boy scouts volunteer to do breast exams" story.

Fatman

"If I ever make it to the UK, I will happily visit Mike to recite hours of memorized Monthy Python sketches and movie scenes."

You consider yourself to be a "Monty Python Reenactor" then Acharnement? One of those whom the OFM described as "irritating and boring" – surely not!!

TMP satirical? It is often ironic, and usually farcical.

I've long maintained that Germany did 'win' the war in a corporate sense. They got their troublesome leadership removed, and the costs of the restructuring were largely paid by the other side.

Theres a saying in poker to the effect that if you look around the table and don't see a sucker, it's probably you. I think there should be a new one to the effect of: if you have never known a Python reenactor, it's probably you…

Quite clever article..The only reason Germany "won" the peace was that NATO needed a strong Germany as a buffer to Soviet power--

Also not spending loads of money on nuclear weapons helped!!

Making Snorbens into a drinking game is the most recklessly dangerous suggestion I have ever read on this site.

If I drink two fingers of Supermarket own-brand canadian club-style spirit* every time Mike Snorbitz lives up his reputation in a startling po-faced manner, I will be hooting under a bridge on the Leeds-Liverpool canal before you can say 'That Depends what you mean by funny'.

Pat

*yes, really. £7.00 GBP for a bottle. after the first three glasses no longer makes you do bad Great-Escape style 'wow''s or your money back.

"Making Snorbens into a drinking game is the most recklessly dangerous suggestion I have ever read on this site."

I'm pleased the idea amused you!

Who's for another drink?

"There are few people more irritating and boring than Monty Python Reenactors."

Simpsons reenactors perhaps (note capitals or is that another thread?). Note to self drink more beer.

Family Guy or South Park re-enactors.

However, I'm in for the game, just let me run next door to the Sorority house to raid their bar, should be some Everclear there (mmm… 180 proof grain alcohol)

"The only reason Germany "won" the peace was that NATO needed a strong Germany as a buffer to Soviet power--"

LOL. and the only reason the USSR needed Eastern Europe was as a buffer against Germany invading them (again).

Anyway, I like The Onion, even if I do drop the odd Monty Python line now and again. MP as satire though? bunch of Oxbridge toffs wearing dresses and putting on silly voices. I used to enjoy Terry Gilliams cartoons though.

"MP as satire though?"

Pigeonholing problem. Monty Python material contains satire, but that is not its sole ingredient or even a particularly dominant one.

Another great satire is C.S.A.

imdb.com/title/tt0389828

Plot Summary for C.S.A.: The Confederate States of America (2004)

"Set in an contemporary alternative world where the Confederate States of America managed to win the American Civil War, a British film documentary examines the history of this nation. Beginning with its conquest of the northern states, the film covers the history of this state where racial enslavement became triumphant and the nation carried sinister designs of conquest. Interspersed throughout are various TV commercials of products of a virulent racist nature as well as public service announcements promoting this tyranny. Only at the end do you learn that there is less wholly imagined material in the film than you might suspect. Written by Kenneth Chisholm (kchishol@rogers.com)"

Are these Nazis the evil Mirror universe ones?
link

For you, Snorbens, der Thread is over.

"For you, Snorbens, der Thread is over."

I beg your pardon?

Nein! Ve vill ask ze questions!

Ah, "Man in a High Castle" ripoff. Not the least bit funny, this spoof; the novel wasn't funny either, but it wasn't trying to be….

well, at least it's not a group of 'Rocky Horror Picture Show' re-enactors….dragging 'virgins' up on stage to force them into reciting lines from scenes of the movies as they are shown on the screen!
(doing the time-warp again!!!!!)

I guess you could say Germany, Italy and Japan 'won' the war if you look at the TRADE deficits and other socio-political things today…..(and want to get blooh-fezzy)…or the Brits…considering we 'beat em fair and square' twice in twenty years back in late 1700's/early 1800's and so on and so fourth…..yada, yada, yada as Seinfeld would say…

As for WARGAMING/RPG applications…the WWWII/Turtledove series, 'what if' Stalin and Hitler's brains were moved to back side of Moon or Mars or Antarctica….or game versions of 'Amerika' (where the former USSR 'takes over' the USA) or RED DAWN….etc…

All very 'gameable' scenarios….as would be DISTRICT 9, 'V-the visitors' and so fourth.

As far as POLITICALLY CORRECT/DEBATEABLE conversation topics, OUTSIDE the 'fez'….as Captain Apathy would so elequently say….'Meh'…..(21st century version of 'Nuts'?)

Onion has had some 'funnier' things and some less…but then again…I thought the Chia-Obama-pet commericals on TV two weeks ago were 'gags' too….ooops, my bad!

'bwee werry werry qwiet….huhuhuhuhuhuh, I'm hwuntwing TWENTAKULES……

Sgt DWW-btod and temporary mail-order associate pastor of the Church of Da Fudd….

"What if Germany had lost the war?"

Well, if they lost who would fight in Korea, Vietnam, Bosnia, Iraq and Afghanistan? Who?

Well, if they lost who would fight in Korea, Vietnam, Bosnia, Iraq and Afghanistan? Who?

The French of course

Gah- Which Universe am I in- The French did take part against the Taliban in the universe I am in.