""Permission to speak, Sir(e)?"" Topic

To the Boers outside Mafeking – "Look, just wander down and take it, they're all just boy scouts…………."

To Julius Caesar in the forum – "Look out, he's behind you", or Saddam in 2001 "They're not kidding, you know".

Can't believe no one's mentioned this one. To Charles XII in 1708, "Sire, make Peter come to you. Don't wear out your army by marching across the endless tracks of Russia. Attack his flanks and sow the seeds of his destruction by allying yourself with the Turks. Also, take back your Baltic fortresses and make sure the Poles that you've allied yourself to aren't complete losers. Finally, make sure that Denmark is truly not up for a major war. Attack them again and show them who's boss."

"Tsar Nicholas, it would be in your best interest if Rasputin had an 'accident'"

Maybe leave the theatre for another night , mr lincoln.

Maybe tell some romans to stay out of german forests in 9AD, and dont trust that arminius bloke.

Have a quiet word with the patrols on pearl harbour…

To Sir Thomas Picton, night of the 17th/18th June 1815:
Just this once, sir, don't lead from the front. You're already wounded. Remember that premonition you had before the campaign started?

To Michel Ney, May 1815:
Forget the titles, the estates, the baubles. No-one ever truly trusts a turncoat ever again.

You know, you and your wife would love America.

"General Custer, you go down in that valley, you will be nothin's but a greasy spot in the grass."
Actually, that is exactly the advice he was given, if "Little big Man" is anything to go by.

To Captain Nolan, 25th Oct 1854:
Be really careful when pointing out which guns the Light Brigade are to charge, don't just wave your arm vaguely and say 'Those ones over there'.

Somewhere in Mexico…

"They're not gods. You're not doomed. There's more of you, and if you get him before he makes any new friends here you can have him. Oh, and that's called a 'Horse'"

I love the smell of Dawghouse pee in the morning, it smells like CA. I could almost swear I saw a unicorn or a fire truck. :-)

LLC aka Ron

To Montcalm, 1759 : "Just wait for a while, ok, who knows what might happen. Those Brits will still be here in a few minutes, ya know".

To Napoleon in 1812:

Look Sire, I know you won't have a clue what the Army of the Potomac is (or rather will be) but consider this.

They are trying to go from Germana Ford to Richmond with around 120,000 men and you are trying go from Poland to Moscow with more than four times than number.

Count their wagons and then count yours !

I would not speak or say anything to change the outcome.
From Meggido onwards, speak and risk changing the outcome of all future battles. Silence is it's own currency and as rewarding as gold. A Master Commander gets only one chance at success, all or nothing. You pay your money and take your chances.
TR

If I found out I had cancer and was dying, I would go back to the Alamo and die with honor for Texas

Tell Grant before the Crater to just let the Black division lead the attack – Burnside has a half decent plan every now and then but don't make him shift gears.

die with honor for Texas

I'd ban oxymorons!! :D:D:D

"General Gamelin, zero every available railroad gun in on this road intersection here in the Ardennes, and execute a rolling barrage following these highways back into Germany starting on May 9th, for at least three hours straight. Keep the ammunition coming on as steadily as you can, and position all three of the DCRs near the Meuse River line close enough to engage in a counterattack with an hour's notice."

Leland R. Erickson
Metal Express
metal-express.net

To Napoleon 1812

"Sire don't go into Russia it's too cold why not go to Spain and push out those pesky British with six hundered thousand men it'll be no problem"

Captain Gideon

To MacAurthur: The Red Chinese are serious, you might want to prepare a proper defense.

To Burnside at Antietam: Screw the bridge, just ford the damn creek.

To Sumner at Antietam: Before going forward with your lead division, make sure the rest of your corps is on the move.

To all of the Union commanders at Antietam: Synchronize watches, everyone attack at 0600 so Lee can't shift reserves around.

To Haig in June 1916, "Look, sir, these Kitchener Army chaps are really quite bright. They CAN be taught fire and movement".

Byrhthelm,

The problem with training the Kitchener Armies wasn't the recruits, it was the lack of experienced instructors. So many trained men had been lost in 1914/15 – including Boer War veterans who'd learned "fire and movement" the hard way and who had been recalled in 1914 (among them my great-grandfather) – that they were dragging Victorian vets out of retirement, whose service pre-dated "fire and movement."

Publius Quinctilius Varus – Look, its a forest, its a huge forest, in fact you can't really fathom how big a forest it is. You could easily lose, oooh, for sake of arguement, 3 legions in there and never find them again…..

Yes, the "changing history" aspect is always a tricky one (if someone takes advice, and – say – avoids a disaster, then how would the Time-Traveller know that there had been the disaster he was warning against…). Thanks for the humorous responses, especially the one about "they probably could hit an elephant at that range…", and also those about meeting up with the "minor players". Were I ever in a position to influence anyone's actions, all I would say is, "run".

Admiral Kimmel, let's take the fleet out Saturday and have a nice cruise in southern waters.

To "Little Mac" Sharpsburg 1862, "Maybe 30,000 Rebs available at most, not 100,000 like Pinkerton says. There will be no massive counter attack to destroy the AOP today!! Just do it and avoid the next 2 1/2 years !"

To Gustav Adolf after Breitenfeld: Great work. Now lets talk about cavalry charges in the fog.

To Napoleon in 1808: That Fouche fellow really needs to be tossed off a bridge with part of Notre Dame tied to his feet, Talleyrand, the lying dog, needs his tongue cut out, and give Joseph Corsica. At least you don't have to conquer another freaking country. And volume of fire is more important than elan.

To George Washington, December 19, 1776: Attack the Hessians for Christmas? I think its a terrific idea! You only have to cross an ice choked river. How hard can that be compared to hacking a nice long road out of the wilderness for that idiot Braddock?

To Admiral Lee after gunning down the Kirishima: See, hotrodding a battleship through Ironbottom Sound at night at full speed is TOO a lot of fun.

To Bonaparte just before Austerlitz: ''I've got this idea: what if you let the enemy come onto your right while you advance on the left and take Pratzen?''

Watch those honours roll in! Alternatively, to the Corsican consul:

Before Lodi: ''Why not really lead you men over that bridge: make a lovely picture!''

Or: ''Pssst: Did you know that Davout's shagging Josephene?''

To the Imperial Austrian General staff in 1865.

'Did you notice the Prussians' firepower in Schleswig Holstein? Maybe these breach loaders have a future. Mind you, you'll have to teach the troops to shoot rather than just herding them forward in bayonet charges'

Supercilious Maximus

Absolutely! That was certainly part of the problem, but I feel that the mistrust of non-professional soldiers had as great a part to play. I am sure (based on my Grandfather's related experience – a pre-war regular infantryman)that if there had been the will, there would have been a way found; it may not have been perfect, or even as thorough as might have been wished. But given the will, something could and would have been done.